| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have a female friend, whose boyfriend is best friends with my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I have a healthier relationship than they do in that we give eachother loads of space. They dont go to college so they are together everyday, practically living in eachothers houses. More than once, they've gotten sick of eachother and the guy has dumped the girl, telling her it doesn't feel like a rship anymore. So he talks to other girls and doesn't acknowledge his gf when the girls ask about her and flirts with them loads. More than once my female friend has come to me for advice. I tell her that she should stay broken up because he is treating her like crap and she deserves better. She agrees with me, but then gets back together with him , telling me its gonna be on her terms now and she is putting herself first, etc..then all those promises disappear and they become dependent on eachother again, bored and he breaks up with her or she snoops through his Facebook or phone and catches him talking to "whores".. it is a vicious cycle and she NEVER heeds my advice. So why does she ask then?? When she is back with him, I rarely hear from her so I do feel a little used for lack of a better word. She is so excited to hang out w me when he dumps her but then she ignores me when they're together. what should I tell her next time? I'm tired of being ignored.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (27 November 2011):
 Yeah, I think everyone has a friend like this. Comes to you for advice, never listens, you keep telling them the same thing over and over and over and they say "yeah, yeah, you're right blah blah blah", but they just go back to the same old thing.
Eventually, you just have to say "Listen, you know how I feel about this. My feelings haven't changed." and change the subject. If they keep talking, just go uh huh, uh huh, uh huh, but stop wasting energy on getting yourself involved and giving advice that never gets taken. Good luck, sweetpea!
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (22 November 2011):
 Basically, you're ENABLING her to lead this yo-yo relationship with her so-called "boyufriend".... insofar as she knows that she can hang with you when "B/F" dumps her.....
IF you want to break the cycle, then simply stay distant from her the next time she is dumped.... and, if she asks, tell her, "you know, I just get tired of having you ask ME for advice, (you) ignore it, then you get "hurt" yet again, and come to me for solace...."
It might take two times for you to have the gumption to do this and/or for her to understand it... but it's worth a try....
Good luck....
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