A
male
age
36-40,
*istakenForStrangers
writes:Following up from my previous question whereby I asked for advice concerning the 4 and a half year gap (14/19)between myself and the girl I met I just want to thank everyone for reassuring me about how I am no 'monster' as I put it.Going on the advice given that suggested a friendship would be perfectly fine, we've been talking every night on MSN for the past month or so and I have, as always, remained the perfect gentleman.I've brought up the subject of the age gap purely on a FRIENDSHIP basis and she is insistant it's not a problem and knows I'm not some creepy older guy...But;After reading advice given to people in the same situation as me on other websites, I am SO scared. I'm literally shaking.I understand this is a delicate subject, but the things people were saying about people in the same situation as me have made me feel incredibly guilty again and are totaly inacurate.I've done nothing wrong, and I would never break the law.I seriosuly can't stress how seriosu I am about waiting until she's 16 before I tell her about my feelings.Have I got a genuine reason for feeling this bad?It's emotionaly draining.Thanks = )
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male
reader, MistakenForStrangers +, writes (21 July 2007):
MistakenForStrangers is verified as being by the original poster of the question Wow.
2 answers in 2 minutes to a question I posted nearly a month ago.
That's strange...
But yeah, way to rub salt into the wound guys.
Found out she's moving away.
Kind of devastated about it...
Thanks anyway = )
A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (21 July 2007):
 I was in a similar situation years ago. I was a 13 year old girl and he was a 20 year man. We cared very much for each other, but the age differance was too great AT THAT TIME! He, too, waited for me. Unfortunately by the time I was 18 (the age set by my parents, we didnt know I would legally be allowed at 16 or things might have been differant) I had lost interest romantically. We remained friends for years though and recently rekindled our romance. We have now been together for about 2 1/2 years!
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A
male
reader, Uncle Trev +, writes (21 July 2007):
There is nothing wrong in letting her know that you are in love with her.
Please be aware though that the mind of a 14 year old girl can change and by the time she is 16 her feelings may have changed substantially from where they may be at the moment.
You sound like a decent guy - I hope it works but please be prepared if it doesn't.
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A
male
reader, MistakenForStrangers +, writes (26 June 2007):
MistakenForStrangers is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNo!
I havn't done a thing wrong!!
Hah, no no no...I wouldn't EVER.
I am, and will, remain just a freind until the whole legal complication is no longer an issue (just over a year)
If you were to ask people who knew me, they'd tell you I am one of the only honourable guys around as well, and to be honest, I would have to agree with them, lol
I've no problem in waiting either. She means way too much to me to mess things up.
But is soooo not about sex, I can assure everyone of that.
I no quite a few girls as well my age who are in relationships with guys 5 years + as well who got together at 16/17 and a good friend is now engaged to a guy of 26.
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A
female
reader, myp +, writes (26 June 2007):
 no, being attracted to a 14 yr old isnt a sin, or illegal. I used to talk to a guy who was 20 when i was 15, its fine.
You havent broken any laws, nor any moral laws, so relax. Just waiting for her shows that your not a "monster" of any kind, and that you genuinely have feelings for her. I dont know the whole story but its not illegal to tell her your damn near in love with her either, so if you want you can tell her how you feel.
Best of luck
-Myesha
message me to tell me the whole story
i sincerely hope everything works out =)
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A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (26 June 2007):
 You really should date people 18 and up...
DV1
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (26 June 2007):
 as youve said youve not broken the law. Have you?
You have done nothing morally wrong have you?
If you answered no you have no reason to feel guilty do you. Having a friendship is the best thing to do and waiting til shes 16 to do any romantic will save you any legal trouble.
Do not stress over this youve done nothing wrong. So calm down
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