A
female
age
,
*etty j.
writes:i`m a widow of almost 10 months i have been seeing a married man for about 4 months we have kept a low profile as far as his family is concerned, (no small children)now he is telling me he loves me and i believe him, he also states his wife is disabled due to car accidents, any way im hoping for a lasting relationship,how do i ask questions to him about where does he see us in 2 years he said he see`s us still together in a year but what about longer,and how do i get him to tell his son which is his wife`s stepson would love to know him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2009): I could not believe as i read, you actually are living in lala land. You are sleeping with his father and you expect him to befriend him. You have only been widowed for 10 months, sleeping with a married man for 4 months. What is the ‘normal/acceptable’ mourning period? Boy, you move fast!! Your hbs body was barely cold and you started your affair with a married man. You are behaving utterly selfish and cold hearted, you may have this married man but make no mistake, they want NOTHING to do with you. PLEASE leave this married mans family alone. You may be his fathers mistress but that is ALL you are. Have some decency and please do not contact this mans son.
A
female
reader, Carrot2000 +, writes (29 November 2009):
 Are you serious? Really, are you serious? What on earth makes you think that his disabled wife's son wants to meet his dad's girlfriend? You act like you're dating a single dad and want to meet his kids. Newsflash: you're not dating a single man and I doubt your boyfriend wants ANYONE in his family to know about you.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (29 November 2009):
 There's an old saying....It sounds like you're trying to put lipstick on a pig. It's still a pig. Do you understand what I'm saying? You're trying to make a messy situation "nice". It's not nice really and it is kind of strange that you want to open up your discreet relationship to include his son.
You would probably be better off to date someone who is free to date and not married.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (29 November 2009):
 Do you really expect this man to leave a disabled wife for you?
Do you really think that disabled wifes son would want to extend the hand of friendship to a woman who is sleeping with his mother's husband?
I think this man is playing you for a fool, I think you may have rushed into a relationship too soon after your husband's passing, and that you may need to step back and take time to take a long honest look with eyes wide open at your current situation,
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