A
male
age
30-35,
*gtorange
writes:K so, I'm with a girl atm, well, we arn't dating or anything, we're more like friends with benefits. Anyways, we talk for a couple hours a day on the phone, we get along great, and I was planning on asking her out, but as it turns out she's got other friends with benefits.A few of them at that. A couple times she hasn't hung out with me so she could go off with them, and she talks about her ex-boyfriends like they're gods gift to humanity. Whenever I'm with her all these guys constantly text her and whatnot.But when we talk she lets on like she really likes me.I'm thinking I'm just going to move on and let her do her own thing, I'm not too comfy with just being some piece of ass on the side.My question is this, how should I go about doing this? It seems almost harsh to just stop talking to someone who I've been chatting with for hours a day recently, her best friend is dating my best friend too, so we're still going to end up seeing alot of each other, which will make things incredibly akward if I just cut off contact.At the same time though, I don't want to keep in contact and continue developing feelings for someone who I know will never commit to me.Advice?Thanks.
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male
reader, polarkite +, writes (29 March 2008):
 Yeah, if she's lying to you, that's annoying. Here you are trying to be clear and she's lying. Definitely annoying.
A
male
reader, agtorange +, writes (28 March 2008):
agtorange is verified as being by the original poster of the question I don't think I'm going to talk it it out, I'm not too sure.
The last two days now she's lied to me about what she's been doing, yesterday she said she slept all night, when her name on msn said she had gone out with some guy.
Tonight she told me she was going with her friend (a girl friend), but again, her msn name says she's out with that guy again.
So I think I'm just goingto make it clear and cut off contact all together.
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A
male
reader, agtorange +, writes (28 March 2008):
agtorange is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSounds like good enough advice to me.
Almost like weening yourself off cigarettes by cutting down on them, that's a terrible analogy. But I think I'll do just that.
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A
male
reader, polarkite +, writes (28 March 2008):
Peters' advice is good. It's like taking a car from 5th gear and moving it into 1st. You might even consider having an honest conversation with her, just to be clear about where you stand. There's no reason not to be cordial with her.
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A
male
reader, Peterk5699  +, writes (28 March 2008):
 I've been in a similar situation where this girl I began to really like has a boyfriend so it gets awkward.
When I asked what should I do, I was told to distance myself a bit. I think you should do that becauuse it does work. Talk to her on the phone but try to make the calls shorter (plus, it'll save on your bill/credit) and don't reply to texts the minute you get them.
Start chatting to other girls and you'll find that you do have the ability to distance yourself and get on with things.
Sorry if this sounded nasty at all bt I do hope there's a bit of help somewhere.
Good luck :)
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