A
male
age
36-40,
*ir-T
writes:There is this girl at work i would really love to date. I accually see her as someone i could marry but i am scared to ask her out.I have walked her home a couple of times and jokingly mentioned hanging out maybe going to the movies or something but she told me then that she couldn't...why? because she and two of her friends i know very well were trying to match a guy and a girl together by making fabrications.bottom line is, i want her but i dont want to get a no. she is a bit taller than me and a bit bigger as well; secondly, i have been really close to one of her close friends in the past and i have a feeling she might turn me down if her friend has told her she had any feelings for me for fear of sparking jealousy and rivalry.help me please, i want this girl bad
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sir-T +, writes (5 June 2010):
Sir-T is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks LiL :)
A
male
reader, Sir-T +, writes (5 June 2010):
Sir-T is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks DrPsych, you already seem to know me very well :). I am just in my very early 20's so i know i have to leave the marriage thing aside.
and Thanks quirkLady.
I will go for it but i dont want it to ruin the friendship that exists. Another thing i forgot to mention is that i dont know if i am financially buoyant enough to carry on the burden of a gf.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (5 June 2010):
 I think you should ask her out 'as mates' and see what happens. Something that is no big deal like the cinema or the pub.Leave the marriage proposal aside for now! I wouldn't be too disappointed if she says she won't date you though. You should almost prepare yourself for a rejection before you ask her out. Basically if she was really into you romantically then she wouldn't be able to resist - her story about covering up for another person maybe just that 'a story'. She may be letting you down gently as it is easier to hide behind something than tell the brutal truth. If she is putting up excuses to a date now then it just means she is not that into you. However, this doesn't have to be all doom and gloom - if you don't ask you don't know! I hope she says 'yes' by the way as you sound very nice.
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (5 June 2010):
 You've got to just go for it. A no won't be the end of the world.
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