A
male
age
36-40,
*omebloke
writes:Recently me and my girlfriend broke-up, just a few days ago in fact. We'd been going out for about 6 months, she's my best friend and we do love each other. Without sounding bigheaded, she's head-over-heels in love with me. We get on really well and there's almost no clash of personalities at all.The problem is that I don't feel equal to her in other ways. She has been in relationships since she was young, when she was 14 she was going out with an 18 year old.I've had little experience, virtually none throughout my teenage years because I was shy and to be honest quite grumpy, and I've only slept with one girl before her that I did care for but nowhere near as much as I do about her.We started off pretty badly, looking back, because we had been talking on the internet for a while and ended up getting drunk at parties and sleeping with each other. When she was drunk she told me some things that really hurt and that still hurt to this day... 'he was a good fuck even though he treated me like shit' and 'i'd go back to him' etc. She had been going through a bad time because of an abortion about a year and a half ago, and then in January one of her friends who helped her through her abortion died in a car crash. She has said numerous times how she never meant what she said when she was drunk and she wishes she never said them and didn't mean to hurt me. She's a really nice person, even though the things she has said would make her seem otherwise to outsiders.Basically, I broke up with her because I think, or thought, that I need to have more girlfriends to feel equal. I know this sounds really petty but it's been driving me mad knowing how much i missed out on all that stuff in my teens.I really don't know if I'm doing the right thing...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2008): my cousin started dating his wife since they were 15...they're in their mid 30's now married with 2 kids...if you knew she was the one who cares how many people u've had...you let her go you lose her...just because she's in love with you doest mean she always will...you know what you feel best. good lock
A
male
reader, somebloke +, writes (29 August 2008):
somebloke is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the replies. Crierwy, I think she has worked through a lot of her issues and I've been there and helped her, including (I've just remembered) her mum leaving home to live with another man after years and years of affairs behind her dad's back. I think I would've regretted if I didn't break up with her as my past was getting me down a lot and I would've never known what it was like to be single again otherwise because, as I've said, she's head-over-heels about me and wants to stay with me forever. I was having unprovoked mood swings, etc and it just wasn't enjoyable. The single life is attractive, but obviously it can be utter shit as well if you don't find anyone you connect with in a real way. I'm a bit afraid if I throw this away I'll never find anyone better.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2008): move on - or you will have issues lateryou are young
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2008): hey-i understand that you want to live life! which is great! but are you saying you wanna see other girls? what then....are you hoping to get back together with your girl after your fun? will things be the same with you guys-what if you saw her having fun with another man?if you have everythng you want in a girl-why do you feel the need to catch up with what she has done in the past?also-if you are so certain you made the right decision-why are you worried and posting for help- (not in a mean way)i jus want you to realise that this girl may have her flaws-but before you go out and create some of your own-think about how good you have it.love and god bless friend xx
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