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anonymous
writes: Dear cupid, i have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for a year and a bit now, and we recently bought a house together.I know i love him but lately we feel so distant, i've tried to talk about it with him but he justs gets angry and thinks i'm having a go at him and i'm not. Also when his mates are around or we are out in public together he never shows any affection, and when he is around his mates he pays me out and is rude to me. I don't want to lose him but i'm getting so frustrated and upset because i think back to when we were first together, how we were great and i felt loved, and now it's like he doesn't love me. I've also been finding that i have started to have feelings for his brother and i don't mean to, it's just he's really nice to me and talks more to me than my own boyfriend. Please give me advice. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, pashanoodle  +, writes (22 May 2008):
 Your BF's behaviour is really inappropriate - someone who cares about you should not treat you like he has been, there really is no excuse. Something is obviously up with him - but he should be talking to you rather than pushing you away and making you feel the problem is all yours. Because you are already feeling hurt and insecure chances are you are having trouble communicating with him too - do you find yourself trying to talk with him but getting nowhere? Do you break down in tears? Do you feel he doesn't "get" what you're saying to him? If I were you I would think about talking with a professional - for yourself, for strategies on how to approach your BF about relationship issues, to gain insight into your own motivations, figure out what you need etc. As for liking his brother...it is just a symptom of your lonliness in your own relationship - I wouldn't get too involved with that as it will just complicate things further for you right now.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2008): This man's behaviour has changed, he no longer treats you nicely, he gets angry when you try and talk to him and ignores you in public, shows no affection and is rude. This is not nice, this is no way for a man to treat the woman he's living with and in love with. I can't tell you what to do, but you need to take a hard look at your relationship, and ask yourself if your getting the happiness you deserve or settling for 2nd best.
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female
reader, babymamma626  +, writes (22 May 2008):
 Well I have no comment on you liking his brother. But as for him, SCREW THAT! I wouldn't take it! If he gets mad at you just for simply wanting to talk about your feelings then I'd drop him IMMEDIATELY!!! Communication is one of the most important keys in a relationship and it seems to me he is just shuting you out and if he is rude to you in front of his friends..pffffttt that is uncalled for and you don't deserve it! Find someone who will treat you better! :D
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