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I showed him proof that his dating profile was active again it disappeared within minutes and now he's trying to tell me he didnt do anything

Tagged as: Dating, Online dating, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 December 2016) 5 Answers - (Newest, 19 December 2016)
A female Canada age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Hi and thanks for your time and advice in advance.

Been seeing a guy for a few months, been really good. Had a huge row which I think he was over reacting about and we hadn't spoken after over night. I then discover his profile on the dating site we met on is active again.

I've heard this site can show people as active when they are not, however when he hid his profile when we started seeing each other I noted it didn't show and now it does after this row.

I text him that I know he's active and within two minutes it wasn't showing again and hasn't subsequently. He's totally denied going back on but says understands I don't believe him given it showed as active (It was screen shot and sent to him) and he knows I don't trust him now, but says he still cares deeply for me irrespective and always will, but he'd draw the same conclusion given the evidence.

If he hadn't have lied we could have talked it through- people do stupid things.however to deny it and then the profile which was there for hours in the morning to then be gone within two minutes of me telling him I know- that's too much of a coincidence surely?

What do people think please?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (19 December 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntMy guess is that you had a arguement so he went online, you saw it he denied it. I would not judge him so closely on this if you trust him. But do talk to him and ask for the truth

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2016):

I'm sorry but I'm not buying it. I believe there's a chance it could say 'online' for several hours after, but not supposedly several weeks. It's probably his natural defense to lie about it - he's almost manipulating you by saying he would feel the same if it was the other way around, but then reassuring you he wasn't using the dating website.

I'd be pretty confident he's lying though, and it's really not a good sign for him to lie so early on - what else would he lie to you about?! I think you should ask him to be truthful with you - and see if he can be honest and whether or not you guys can talk it through, though it seems you deserve better.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2016):

I too have heard that sites can show online when a person isn't- POF apparently is know for this however for it to disappear as soon as you pull him about it, when it was showing for hours before as active? That's some coincidence. The question is do you want to be with a man who does this in response to an arguement?

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (16 December 2016):

N91 agony aunt100% lying.

I don't think any dating site in the world would say you were online if you weren't.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (16 December 2016):

Honeypie agony auntthat's too much of a coincidence surely?

Yep. I think he is lying.

You two were also getting into argument after dating a "few" months over something you felt he overreacted about, so maybe BESIDES this profile thing, you really aren't that great of a match?

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