A
female
age
36-40,
*anary611
writes:I was dating the sweetest guy in the world for about 3 years... we were in love for most of the time, but we were in a long distance relationship, he was 20 and i was 16....so we had a few differences. He was way too possesive and never trusted me. (i should probably mention that i am kind of a flirt but i was never going to play him...). We had so many issues, like him not liking my friends and the whole trust thing... at some point i even started avoiding ho because everytime he text or called it would be to sort out one of our issues, ever just to say hi or chat... i suppose i didnt want to face the problems in our relationship because i was scared to tell hm hiow unhappy i was, but i knew i loved him.. then after 3 months of these problems i left him and got with another dude who had been trying to steal me from my boyfriend for a while. this guy was the complete opposite of my ex. he was so much fun and took nothing seriously... but he is a player.. He waas going to graduate from high school about 3 months after we first got together and he told some of my friends we were only going to be together while he was around. this dude was the perfect asshole, a jerk, a woman seducing charmer, complete lothario, and he had me hooked... When me and my ex broke uop my ex said some really nasty things and thats why i didnt even hesitate to get with someone else.. then fter about 2 weeks my ex started calling me again , he apologised for all the things he said and told me he wasnt over me... we still loved eachother...but my badboy boyfriend was sooooooooooo much fun. he was funny and charming and i swear he is the best kisser on the planet. I kept talking to my ex on the phone and all my feelings for him were rushing back....but we got into an argument at some point about my nu boyfriend and stoppd talking.. then me and my dude also got into a fight and broke up on his last weekend at school coz he wanted to have sex with me and i'm a virgin so i told him no.... we broke up and he got with two other people that night. it was heartbreaking...but come monday he wanted me back and i still liked him so i accepted thinking it cant be much longer now.... the school year was almost over. Then when we got home me amnd him got really close... he really started to care about me...i could see it.. but he lives in another country so ha left after a while but he told me he'd be back in a month... during that time.. he kept tlling me that he really fell for me. i spoke to his friends who now tell me that he's serious about me... but i cant trust him and i uhm... i kinda played him with my ex one night and i need to tell him that. right now, i dont know whether to stay wuth him or go back to my ex..... at first i thought i'd just go back to my ex but sum1 told me that when a player falls 4 a girl and she screws him over he gets 14 times worse tha before and i dont want to mess this dude up, i do actually care about him.. bu i already broke my ex's heart once and he's telling me he doesnt want to lose me for good and we do really love eachother... but like i said the badboy is more fun... i dont know what to do. Please help me
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broke up, flirt, kisser, long distance, my ex, player, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): The bad boy may be more fun, but you know he's a player and even got with two people in one night. Do you see yourself having any kind of future with him?
As for your ex, you say he was perfectly sweet in one breath, but then you turn around and say he was possessive and didn't trust you – both indicative of a future abusive relationship, whether it be emotional or physical abuse.
It sounds like neither guy is good for you, although one is fun and you feel so connected to the other.
In the end, it's going to be you who makes the decision on who you want to be with. Consider all the options, and especially the consequences.
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