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I have sexual feelings towards my cousin...

Tagged as: Faded love, Family, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 August 2008) 8 Answers - (Newest, 26 August 2008)
A male Australia age 26-29, anonymous writes:

me and my cousin are the same age (just 4-6 weeks apart) and are really close. Ive been having sexual feelings for her for some time now and i'm not shure whether she has the same. i have thought up a tactic to say someting like -please excuse me if i'm not allowed to say this in a question- "do you want to see my enis?"(i say this because if she says "no way!", i can say that i said "wenis" (which is apart of the hand) and if she says yes, then i'll say: "ill do it if you do it" and so on and ye. This would only be looking at each other and touch, not intercourse.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2008):

Fist off dont let anyone tell you it is sick or wrong because it isnt, love knows no boundries. I had the same situation with my cousin, she is about 2 months younger than me. I got the courage to just tell her straight and said like i understand if you are mad, but if your close she will still respect you, anyway she felt the same and one thing led to the , we are both very happy. And for the family we just hey if they dont like it tough, they were split but there warming to the idea. Anyway good luck

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A male reader, topgun4h United States +, writes (11 August 2008):

Hmm. dont worry about it. If you both feel the same it can work out. It is about love most of all, do not do it just for the sex, that will cause more issues than it is worth.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (5 August 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntYea! Wenis...new word!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008):

By the way - the wenis is the skin on your elbow.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008):

There's absolutely nothing wrong with having feelings for your cousin, but wait until you're a bit older before considering acting on those feelings - at least the minimum age - which I believe is 16 where you are.

Your hormones are probably all over the place at the moment and so are hers, and you really don't want to make a complete fool of yourself and do something you'll regret for years to come. That's not a very clever tactic that you're dreaming up by the way. Corny even - and she'll probably think you're a complete and utter tosser and you'll blow your chances for later.

When you've matured a bit and are capable of having an adult conversation instead of a schoolboy 'playground' one, you could ask her in a mature way if there's any chance of the two of you getting together, which is your ultimate intention. She might just say "yes".

There's no legal or moral bar to a relationship with your cousin once you're of age. Wait until then.

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A female reader, O Connor Ireland +, writes (5 August 2008):

O Connor agony auntyou want to ask her does she want to see your penis?? oh my god. and just to let she know if she has any sense she is not going to fall for the "no i said wenis" excuse.

your family would be horrified if they walked in on you two naked with eachother. its normal to have a crush on your cousin but its not normal to act on it. you will freak the poor girl out. i cant believe you are really thinking of asking her that!

its wrong to do this so dont act on it. your family would be ashamed.

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A male reader, StudentOfLife Canada +, writes (5 August 2008):

StudentOfLife agony auntI had crushes on my cousins as well when I was younger, they were all babes! I also develop tactics like yours but stopped myself before doing them because I thought "What will my family think about that if they ever know."

Got a bit scared so I chickened out.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008):

What do you think the rest of your family would say if they knew you were engaging in sexual behaviour with a cousin? If they are like most families in Western culture they'd be horrified. Either people will find out, and you will both have a hard time, or no-one will find out and you will have a dirty little secret between you that will always feel bad. As you say you wouldn't have intercourse with her anyway you know this isn't right. Find someone unrelated to fool around with.

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