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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I hate that my boyfriend watches porn. I gave him many pictures of me, and he himself has taken several pictures of us doing stuff. But he doesn't use them at all, he just uses regular big tit porn. I have small boobs, and I'm not as perfect as those models. I feel really bad, because why bother in giving him those pictures then? Why take all the hassle of looking sexy, or trying to, if he doesn't appreciate them?Yeah, yeah, I know, it's my problem, I shouldn't be insecure, I should get over it, they fulfill fantasies I never will... ugh. What can I do? I'm so angry because I just discovered this fact, and here I was thinking he liked my pictures better, but he never uses them. I feel so inferior to the damn porn!No, I don't like porn, I know many people here do, but I don't and that's ok.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2013): My husband has been doing the same thing. I workout, stay attractive, never turn him down....I even have breast implants that look good! He has destroyed any trust I have in him, because he will tell me he promises to stop...and then I always find it again. It's a horrible way to live. I wish I didn't love him so much and could work up the courage to leave. Good luck to you. I wish this on no one.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2009): Don't like porn too. My boyf doesn't either. He finds it disgusting and really off-turning because the media like puts it everywhere and other reasonsAm 17 with A cup boobs. I love them and my boyf definitely does too. All my ex boyfriends have as well. I've only ever had boyfriends that I knew loved me like I am and weren't the type to watch porn- at least not while in a relationship (guys generally with lots of hobbies, good morals and beliefs, guys who go out and get the real thing instead of sitting in front of the computer kind of guys etc.)Advice: Confront himPost back about his arguments or anything and we'll give you more advice on what to say back and what to do You deserve a boyfriend that will respect love and cherish you!Goodluck! :)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2009): I'm in the same boat -- two years with this guy and he still regularly watches porn while I'm at work or on his lunch break, sometimes (I've looked at his internet browser...) while sending me text messages from his email account! He's watching other women and talking to me at the same time! Ugh.... The consensus seems to be "all guys do it," but the fact that it's common doesn't make me feel less hurt. If I come home after he's been watching porn he doesn't have sex with me, it makes it feel like he's using videos of other women to fulfill his sexual needs then letting mine go unmet. I don't have any advice for you, just wanted to say that I'm in the same boat. It hurts so much to know that when I'm not home (even if it's just for a few hours) he's watching these other women who look nothing like me to gratify himself. I seriously hate it.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2009): I hate it too...
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2009): the only way to come out of this is dont make yourself easily available to him to have easy sex....get all those pictures back and stop having sex with him for a while.let him get attracted to you.....prefer sex to sexy photos.and thats what's creating a problem...
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (6 November 2009):
Cut him out of the pictures that you have together, then replace his head and body with magazine cutouts of hot men. My personal favorites include: David Beckham, Hugh Jackman, and Carey Hart. Now that you have replaced those photos with men that you feel are more stimulating...don't forget to make a shrine of more cutouts and posters of nearly genetically perfect men in your room above your bed (like you did when you were 14). When he asks why you did that, let him know that although you enjoy seeing his face ocassionally, these men just "do it" for you...sorry honey.
In all honestly though, he probably won't stop and will continue to do it behind your back. But, I would also probably be hurt by him not caring about the pictures you took for him. You know he finds you attractive, but he likes fake things he can't have, they're objects to him. Eventually (and I've known guys that have said this) he'll grow out of the fake chicks...get desensitized by them. Seeing them all the time won't turn him on anymore, so he'll move on to something different like redneck chicks or obese women.
But I would still do the picture thing I suggested, it really would be kind of funny and make him feel inferior to what you like, kind of like how he makes you feel.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (6 November 2009):
 If your guy is addicted to pornography, which seems apparent based on your posting, and if he also resists pleasing you on a reasonably regular basis, then you may need another lover. Porn may be useful when a guy (or gal) is lonely without a better alternative, but relationships are usually adversely affected.
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