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I don't want to lose my boyfriend by telling him I'm pregnant with his twins, but I don't want to give them up or have an abortion either!

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Pregnancy, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 December 2010) 10 Answers - (Newest, 20 February 2011)
A female United States age 22-25, anonymous writes:

Hello, I found out I'm pregnant at 17 and to make it even bigger its twins! I am so scared to tell my boyfriend. We both noticed I was gaining weight but I stopped working out the past few weeks because it was too time consuming. I don't want to lose my boyfriend telling him but I really don't want to give them up or have a abortion! Please help I am so scared!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Hi everyone! Its been a while since I posted a baby update so heres one!---I am now 21 1/2 weeks:) I am very fat and I feel like a whale! Its starting to feel a lot of pain in my back and waste. I'v been on bedrest since 18 weeks. Its a boy and a girl and the names are Tristan Daran and Isadora Rose. My dad took the news ok hes upset but he said he will help, my mom wants no part in it. But mabey that will change. His parents are ok with it, they wished we would have waited but they are here for us. Thanks for your support guys I will keep you posted!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2011):

Congratulations! Just thought I'd share my story so you don't feel so alone :)

I'm 19, and My fiance and I have been together for 2 years and 4 months now. And at a year and a half he proposed! :) 2 months later I got pregnant. We discussed with each other what we would do, he was set on me getting an abortion because he was so scared to tell people. But I was already in love with the baby.

Once we finally told family members one by one, he (my fiance) became so happy about becoming a Dad, because he was very surprised that our families were very excited!

Now that we have seen the baby on ultrasounds and heard the heartbeat many times, he felt bad for ever thinking about aborting it.

I am currently 34 weeks pregnant (with just one baby) and due this February. We can't wait to meet our little baby in about 6 weeks.

Pregnancy is such an amazing thing and you should feel double blessed to have 2 babies at once!

Good luck with everything :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Hi everyone(Question writer):

First I will anwser some of the questions/comment you guys had, yes 2 other people knew, close friends was there when I took the pregnancy test. I will tell my parents but we already were planning to move out in the next few days to a home a half an hour away so I will tell them after I move.

I told my boyfriend and he accepted it we have been friends/dating a long time so he said nothing can break us so hopefully thats true because we have to tell his parents tonight when we go for dinner.

So.... BABYS UPDATE!!! So I had a ultrasound yesterday (with my boyfriend!) and I am 14 weeks and its definitly twins! I am gaining weight like crazy, I look 20 weeks, I am a very small frame person so they will be conserned about me having a early delivery(30-35wks:( But we have a while till then! Thanks for anwsering my question and I will keep you guys posted on the twins!

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A female reader, Emily Anastasia United States +, writes (3 January 2011):

Hey.i cant help but notice your stuck in a tough situation.you dont wanna loose your boyfriend...and you dont wanna give up your twins.in my opinion you need to tell your boyfriend asap!he had sex...and needs to accept the fact that he is now a father.please dont abort your twins!!!!your babies need to come first.boyfriends come and go...but those babies will always be yours.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2011):

heey hun, bless you, i wanna give u a huge hug () if that boy dumps u he was never worth it, boys who want sex but cant cope with its possible outcomes are just users, but take it slow because although he may freak out at first, he should soon come round to the idea. Oh and btw congratulations! X

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2011):

oh hun, unless u break all contact with him and move away ur never gonna hide this one! Firstly if u havent already then tell ur folks. Secondly a good and trusted friend or bro/sis/cousin who can b ther to hold ur hand when u tell him or waitin round the corner at least! U are not gonna b able to hide twins for very long unless ur a large person and even then it wouldnt b right to. This guy is gonna b a daddy and he's the right to know it! Dont b afraid in ur own hunit never pays to suffer in silence! Best of luck and keep us posted xxx

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A male reader, Cerberus_Raphael Sweden + , writes (1 January 2011):

Cerberus_Raphael agony auntHave you told anyone at all? Your parents perhaps? In my opinion, they are the first ones who should know, as your parents, your father and your mother should be the ones who take care of you if your boyfriend rejects you. It will not be easy but it is necessary. Sit them down and tell them what happened, then, tell your boyfriend. After telling your parents, the conversation with your boyfriend should not be such a daunting task. If he is decent he will take care of you and accept his responsibilities with little hesitation. Of course, at 17 it is a threateningly large role to accept so give him a little more time if he becomes nervous or fearful.

I know this moment in your life might seem like a terrifying time but you cannot keep this hidden, you cannot attempt to. You have to face everything and be honest to everyone so they can take care of you and let you know that everything is going to be alright. If your boyfriend rejects you, do not waste a second longer on trying to persuade him, he would not be the type of man you want in your life anyway, no matter how strongly you feel about him right now. Good luck.

I hope that helps.

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A female reader, LittleMissy United Kingdom +, writes (1 January 2011):

Hey hunni, I think you should do what's in your heart. I don't see why you would lose your boyfriend because your pregnant. My belief is that If he's man enough to have sex then he should accept the possible consequences. Do not let anyone or anything pressure you into something you don't want, you will regret it for the rest of your life. If he's worth it then he'll stand by you and if he doesn't then he didn't deserve you. Being a single mother might be hard but those babies will love you unconditionally. Do what feels right for you and just remember though you might not have your bf, you'll never be alone. Xx

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A female reader, Secretlife Congo +, writes (1 January 2011):

It's ok to be afraid. if you boyfriend really loves you then he will do everything he could do to take care of his kids. Find an appropriate time to tell him. It's going to be ok.

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A female reader, Mjfbla United States +, writes (1 January 2011):

Mjfbla agony auntTell him. If you lose him for that then he isn't someone who's good to have around anyway. Besides..how long do you think you can really hide it?

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