A
female
age
36-40,
*rndz4life
writes:hi i am in a relationship with a guy for past 6 months. he is very sweet and understanding and loves me a lot.the problem is the way he talks with his 2 3 female friends (one of them is his ex but now friends with her).they call each other with pet names like how a gf calls his bf and other way.they exchange texts like miss you and all (my bf asked me to answer his text since he was busy).he had also told them he liked them.actualy he is extroverted and i am a bit introvert. may be thats how people deal with friends but i just dont like the way he talks to them. i havent yet discussed this with my bf since that might hurt it. i have tried to avoid it. but these are his close friends so i need to deal with this almost evryday. am i being too over reactive or is it normal to behave like this with friends?????????
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, malvern  + ♥, writes (5 October 2012):
 In response to your recent comment - I think his friends are being a little bit naughty about this. They don't want him themselves but at the same time they regard him as their friend/property and don't want his attention taken away from them by a girlfriend. In my experience of life (I'm 60) I have found that there are women around who are like this. Try to ignore it if you can. If you can become friendly with them they may start to see you in a different light and gradually stop flirting with him, but if they notice you're upset they'll do it even more.
A
female
reader, frndz4life +, writes (5 October 2012):
frndz4life is verified as being by the original poster of the question@malvern yes they are his friends for a long tym n they also know about me but they flirt even more than he does with them. i trust my bf because he tells me when he goes out to meet them but i do feel insecure evrytime now..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2012): Your bf is entitled to have female friends. There is absolutely nothing wrong in having friends of the oppposite sex. HOWEVER, the pet names and "miss you" messages are crossing the limit of friendship. It's fine for him to chat with them but it is equally important for him to just keep them in the "friend zone". As a woman myself, I am sure to feel insecure and uncomfortable if my bf was getting too over friendly with other females. Telling them that he likes them is definitely inappropriate. He is in a relationship with you after all, not them.Perhaps you can communicate with him and tell him how you feel. Assure him that you are totally cool about him keeping his female friends but you don't like it when he goes over the limit by using the words that he does with them. It's about time you open up about your feelings rather than keeping it all within, as this will only cause you to feel more worried. All the best.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2012): I think it depends hugely on the individuals. My best friend is female. We've never been more than friends. We have a pet name for each other (well, two, actually). We're both single but when I was with my ex, she still called me by the pet names.
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A
female
reader, malvern + ♥, writes (5 October 2012):
You really need to talk this over with your boyfriend because it clearly makes you feel uncomfortable. Who are the female friends? Has he known them a long time and do they know about you? If so then the chances are there's nothing to worry about. On the other hand if they are girls who think they've got a chance with him, then you've every reason to feel threatened. If you don't get a satisfactory reply then it's perhaps best to walk away from this relationship because the situation is only going to continuously upset you.
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