A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:When I go out to bars and clubs I am shy. I want to be able to go out on the dance floor and dance with confidence. I am so nervous though that I am stiff as a board, literally can't move. When I am at home alone I can dance while listening to music (when no body is looking.) Has anyone ever heard of a dance class or dance lessons you can take to learn to dance with confidence in public.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for your advice.
A
female
reader, mizz.butterflies +, writes (6 February 2010):
 Do start going to clubs in other towns like another reader said.
People know me as the "dancing queen" or the "club queen". This is because I maintain a healthy attitude at the club while I still do my thing.I never get tipsy or drunk.This is wrong,especially for you,cause you're not feeling comfortable dancing so if you drink a lot your steps will look out of place etc.
I suggest you go to a club where you know what kind of music they play.This way you will feel the rythm and meet people of the same interests. You will know what kind of songs to expect and that will get you in the right mood.You can practice some of those songs at home. Try watching Beyonce's videos. She dances in a very confident and classy way.Wear your best outfit and promise yourself that you will not leave the club without dancing! I suggest you go to hip hop clubs. I tried different clubs,but the people wouldnt dance and I felt out of the water.Best of luck!
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A
female
reader, Carrot2000 +, writes (5 February 2010):
 I have struggled with this in the past, too. One thing that helped me was going to clubs outside of my neighborhood or city. I found my self-consciousness went away when I was dancing around people I didn't know--and probably would never see again. Of course, I came to realize that nobody was staring at me--or even gave a damn--and I was able to build up my confidence.
The important things is to have FUN! Be silly if you want. You would not believe how much attention I get from men when I'm just out there having a good time--I actually get more attention than the women who are too busy being pretty to get out and dance.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2010): I used to have this exact same problem, till one time, i had a few drinks then just got out there and did it.
You're putting everybody else dancing on a pedestal. if you actually sit back and watch everybody on the dancefloor you'll see that most of them aren't doing anything special, and it certainly doesn't look like a beyonce video.
Just dance like you would dance infront of your mirror. dance like nobody is watching. If you look and act confident and like you're having a blast it will look fine. Anyone who is stiff, self conscious and awkward will stick out.
So all in all, my advice to you is just get out there and do it! Fuck what everybody else thinks, and trust me, everybody else is too busy wrapped up in enjoying themselves to notice.
Don't ruin the best years of your life because of other people.
Good luck to you, you'll be over this in no time trust me! x
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