A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:How do I stop yearning for my ex bf? It's been 5 years since we broke up after an 8 year relationship. My problem is that the feeling that I have lost my home are still there, and I don't know how to make this stop.We had been living together, and broke up because I got a new job which meant long shifts including nights and weekends, he felt jealous that I saw more of my work colleagues than him as a result. I discovered that he had been sexting his work colleague. He told me it was because he felt lonely when I was working and liked having an exciting double life. So we split up. He begged me to take him back. I did after 9 months apart but, much as I tried, I couldn't quite trust him again and he said he felt like I was too good for him, and that he thought we should split up for good. Although in my head I knew we wrre struggling with our relationship and a split would be healthy, in my heart I wad crushed as I truly felt like he was the love of my life. We went no contact. It took me a year to heal and to start dating again. Noone compared! The feelings I had for him were unlike any for any previous bfs.Anyway, things got a little easier and I unexpectedly met a gorgeous guy and we've been together 3 years now. He's asked me to move in with him and has dropped hints about marriage ( something I have never been interested in throughout life). He's a good guy, but our perspnalities don't match all that well. I am thinking of asking for a break to rethink the relationship. I don't know if by doing so I would be allowing my ex to sabotage this relationship? I don't think about him much, and when I do find myself thinking about how compatible we used to be, I balance it with remembering his less good points. I guess I just miss who he was at first and the feelings I used to have when we were together and happy-a feeling of being home. I have no desire to contact him or see him ever again. Do these kind of feelings ever completely fade?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2014): Just keep dating .
I am in a similar situation to you but I struggle to date because they never give me the same spark I had all that time ago .. And well I go on one date and then don't fancy another.
Also like I know my ex has changed , so would yours he wont be that 18/19 any more life would of changed him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2014): Let go of the past....
To ruin a current relationship over a ex is stupid. You'll only end up alone. Your ex could be married already for all we know.
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