A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:how long does it take to get over my first love?i dated this girl since oct 2012. she was the one who went after me. i had the biggest crush on her to scared to say anything. she was just amazing beautiful kind funny and very tall 6 feet. we were good friends before all of this very close. but something went wrong and she broke my heart. she tells me she cant do this. she says she loves me always will but she just cant. i was so sad first week unbeareable. but its been well over a month since then 6 weeks. im ok now but im just sad. some days i miss her dearly it hurts. but other days im fine. shes made it clear just friends isnt an option. i miss being with her talking to her. my friends said wait 90 days then try talking to her. its been 2 weeks since i spoke to her. she deleted my fb and my number. so i think everything she felt is gone. does she still think about me? is there any hope to still be friends? will 90 days fix this?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2013): I cannot tell you for sure if she misses you or not but let me tell you this: I delete my exes Facebook and phone number to stop me from contacting them because i still have strong feelings for them. Maybe she has strong feelings for you still.
Since you seem to have talked to her after the break up and things didnt change for the better, I would try going total no contact for a few months. One of two things will happen, either she will come back to you, or you will have moved on. Either way its a win-win for you.
I wish you the best! I know us girls are hard to understand at times. :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2013): My friend what you described what happened to you happened to me about four years ago. The last thing you do is withdraw and beat yourself up over something that had underlining issues that are not your fault. I am sure you have some valuable life lessons learned from this experience. I learned to guard my heart more closely in the future so any love I give to any one would be earned. After every opening relationship the honey moon phase disappears and then your partners true colours start shining through. Some good but some could be real bad. Remember as you know that some people might say one thing and really mean nothing or something totally misguided. You have to dig deep many times to find the actual truth. And sometimes you find out that the person you think is great and a potential great partner is all mixed and screwed up. The sooner you pick yourself up and the sooner you will move on. Good-luck.
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