A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:My question is how do you know if a married man has fallen for you and whether his love is honest and not just looking for an affair? with an age gap Good advice needed and alot of advice needed
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affair, married man Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, catdog  +, writes (29 July 2008):
Well I am unsure. I am having this problem too. I work with him this has been going on a year and we have not become intimate but he claims I am his best friend. calls me 5 times a day and seems as if he expects me to be his girlfriend. If you want to talk about this email me... maybe we can figure it out together.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 May 2008): If he's married and pursuing an affair, you can be certain that if his lips are moving he is lying to you. I know from the hourses mouth, my husband (now finally in therapy)after years of on again, off again cheating. He told me that he would have said anything - more than once did - to get into someone's pants.
His behavior is not atypical of men who cheat. They are looking everywhere but inside to solve their problems. They end up making themselves and everyone involved with them miserable.
If he respected you and genuinely loved you, would he still be with his wife and turn you into some dirty little secret? No, he would leave his wife, get his act together and then pursue you. No matter what else he might say to you (and these guys are charming) if he is still married and not filing for divorce you know everything you need to know. Run, don't walk, to the nearest exit.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2008): If you women were treating your men right, then they wouldn't be looking for an affectionate female instead of staying with a cold fish. You have them by the neck because of alimony and child support. My husband cheated on me and I know some of it was my faught. Give your man the attention he deserves so he can stop praying on our emotions.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2008): I already know because I'm in love with a married man and i wouldnt want anybody to fall in my footsteps, its the most hurtful and loniless shit you could ever do. I wish i had NEVER got into the mess that im in !! You get No holidays,and at night you lay in your bed so alone!! I want to get out but im 4 years into it and its hard, I really need help
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2008): If he cheats on his wife with you he's hardly trustworthy is he? If he loves you then he should wait until he's left his wife before pursuing you. That way you'd know he was serious and his advances to you woulnd't be for an affair. It would also be much fairer on his wife
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2008): Yes, see if he will tell his wife.And, of course, don't just take the guy's word that he told his wife and she's cool with it. Test that idea independently to see if she really knows the whole story about you and the fact that their marriage is "over."
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2008): Hello1 hit the nail on the head.
If he hasn't told his wife, he is not sincere, simple as that! x
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (24 February 2008):
 If he give you the 5C's, Cash,Car, Condo, Credit Card,and Country club membership.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): Wrong!! - Many married men WANT to leave their wives. However, the problem is guilt and the law. If most men were able to have amensty for a day to get out of marriage for one day. The lines would be full at City Hall.Yes, you need to know he's sincere. Most of the females here are bitter and older. You may even be their competition.He needs to show you his plan. He needs to set goals and milestones to show his sincerity. From this you can decide his direction and honesty. I had a wife that chested on me, Am I wrong to have possibly falen for someone else. You make the decision.
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A
female
reader, Aylarsh +, writes (24 February 2008):
 A Married man won't leave his wif for you!! No way honey.
He'l just want a little play thing and use you up until he finds someone thats youger than you. Stear clear of this man! Find yourself someone new that loves and cares for you.
Good luck love!
3
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 + ♥, writes (23 February 2008):
 He may have fallen for you, but that doesn't mean he'll leave his wife.
He's not being honest with his wife or you, unless he's moved out and has filed for divorce and has admitted that he wants to be with you to his wife.
Somehow, this doesn't sound like what's happening here.
Don't give spend time on a man who is unavailable...
Age gap, I assume you're young and lovely? And he's older and sure of himself?
Oh, dear, this won't end well for you unless you don't care that he'll never leave his wife.
Sorry to be blunt, but you know you need this advice or you wouldn't be here!
All the best.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2008): They are just out the for the 'cake and eat it' bit on the side, sorry but that is the blunt truth. I know, i was the little wife left at home with two little kids, when my pig had three affairs. Sorry, also, but if there werent any mistresses in the world, marriages wouldnt fall by the way side. I think you need to walk away with your head held high and get one who is free and single and yours 100% because this one wont be. Take for instance Christmas, do you think for one minute he is going to spend all of it with you, er no way, you will be lucky if you see him briefly during the holiday season. That is just one instance.Have some bloody pride girl and walk away now before more than one person get hurt, you will always be the one sitting at home waiting for him to ring, never the other way round. And remember he is lying to her as well as you. He will say he doesnt love her anymore, BOLLOX!take carexx
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (23 February 2008):
 You will know a married man is falling for you if he is developing a "special" friendship with you. What this means is the two of you will start going to innocent places (lunch, coffee, etc) alone. He will start to disclose personal things about himself to you as this friendship progresses. You will also be kept secret from his wife. He cannot start to fall for you unless this happens. Anything else, flirting, body language, etc...means there is no intention of doing anything and you are not on his mind much.
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister +, writes (23 February 2008):
You will know a married man is falling for you if he is developing a "special" friendship with you. What this means is the two of you will start going to innocent places (lunch, coffee, etc) alone. He will start to disclose personal things about himself to you as this friendship progresses. You will also be kept secret from his wife. He cannot start to fall for you unless this happens. Anything else, flirting, body language, etc...means there is no intention of doing anything and you are not on his mind much.
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A
female
reader, hello1 +, writes (23 February 2008):
 If he splits with his wife. It's that simple
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2008): Honey, his love could never ever be honest. If somehow you end up being together, how could you ever tell if he's being truthful? If his love was honest, he would finish with his wife and be with you. Obviously, his feelings aren't that strong, so you could never trust a man. Once he has cheated, there's nothing stopping him going back (in most circumstances). When a married man cheats, it's impossible to tell if he loves you. No matter what, he's lying to one of you, and doesn't want to come out with the truth.
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