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How do I make a text conversation fun?

Tagged as: Crushes<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 August 2014) 5 Answers - (Newest, 31 August 2014)
A female United States age 22-25, *155960 writes:

How do you make a conversation fun over text message. When I text my crush I feel like I can't continue the conversation with anything interesting. Whenever I would ask a question he would usually say yes or no and he'll put lol in every message. I want to say something to him that would make him want to text me back. I need advice!!!

View related questions: crush, text

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A reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2014):

"I want you inside me." "I wish you'd just take me from behind and slap my face."

Those will get a reaction from him.

OP it sounds to me like you have nothing to say to him because what you really want to say you can't. You like the guy, so you're probably messaging hoping to build something but all you're doing is messaging him for the sake of being in contact with him.

Why not just ask him out or open up about how you feel and stop beating around the bush?

You're not going to get anything other than short replies because you have nothing to say and frankly, OP, you can't force that. You can try and say funny things, or interesting things but if it's not natural, it's forced and that's pointless.

So instead of doing the meek thing and just trying to get your fix of a guy you're probably starting to bore, try doing something about your crush. Make a move, flirt do something other than try and get long replies.

He may be interested but like me just doesn't like texting all the time with inane nonsense just for the sake of it. A lot of people are like that. I'm not a fan of just texting for no reason, just to have a text conversation I need to have something to say.

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (31 August 2014):

olderthandirt agony auntWhat I do, I don't know if it's funny or not, but I tell people that " If my reply is slow,it's because my thumb is broken and I'm having to use my nose"

Some do an lol back..some don't reply at all which is the point anyway.

I'm always amused that people feel more comfortable doing than just calling up and talking. I mean the technology is here why not use it?

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A female reader, Noli South Africa +, writes (31 August 2014):

No, but I wouldn't try to justify his lack of texting enthusiasm by claiming that most males hate texting. It's true that most do. But if your crush is anywhere near your age group and is living in the digital age of 2014, he must have, at some point, understood that texting is just part of life now and that it needs to be gotten over. He cannot get away with texting 2 word messages for the rest of his life. I guarantee that if he had a major crush on another girl, who constantly texted, he wouldn't mind giving texting conversations a try as a means to chat with her.

Yes, texts don't equate real conversations, but I don't feel that is the problem here.

He doesn't sound interested. If he did (but hated texting) he'd make plans to talk to you in other ways.

You usually text him first, right? I know it's not a nice feeling (I've been there) but right now, that seems to be the matter.

How to increase his interest a little more? I say, when texting (if it's the absolute form of communication), try asking him open ended questions, ones that start with why.

Or be a little sarcastic (but do it well and effectively, please) and silly and tease him.

Beware of being the only one who initiate questions. It's good to get people talking about themselves, but you don't want to sound overeager. Challenge him. Don't put him on a pedastule.

If he responds coldly to an interesting question you ask, say something bold but effective like, "yaawwwwn....". If he asks about it tell him the truth, that he is as good a conversationalist as you thought he was.

He might be offended. It might be harsh. But it may also get him to try show you otherwise.

Are you getting my overall drift? Haha, my personal opinion. Good luck :) x

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A male reader, WiseOwlE United States + , writes (31 August 2014):

When a guy gives you one or two-word responses to your text messages, he doesn't like texting.

You're losing his interest; because you're hiding behind the screen of a digital device. He might think you're no fun and one-dimensional. That is also a way girls try to hold you hostage for attention; by sending a constant stream of text messages until they drive a guy crazy. That's just a little too shallow, boring, and needy! Call and chat, or invite him out. If you want him to like you, try using your personality. Nature gave you feminine charm and mystique for a reason.

You can't hang on to people by keeping them constantly responding to text messages. Guys get ADD and just get tired of them. It might start-off as a flurry of messages; but it soon becomes a tedious routine. Talking and hanging out together is a much better alternative. It develops personality, charm, and interpersonal skills. Try it!

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia + , writes (31 August 2014):

Aunty BimBim agony auntSome studies claim that up to 93% of communication is non verbal, and the non verbal components include body stance, hand movements, facial expression, and tone of voice.

Consider how much more you lose when you rely only on the written word, and a shortened version of the written word at that!

No wonder you are having difficulty to have interesting conversations, and your crush resorts to mere yes LOL or no LOL's .....

Dare to be different, and rather than rely on text to gender interest actually call him, (a slight improvement because at least he will be receiving tone of voice component of your communication), or even better, give him the benefit of 100% full on communication and have your conversations face to face.

You will be amazed how effective that can be!

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