New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244938 questions, 1084216 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

How can I tell him that I suffer anxiety without making it sound like an excuse for needy behaviour?

Tagged as: Dating, Health, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 January 2017) 2 Answers - (Newest, 22 January 2017)
A age 36-40, * writes:

Hi everyone,

I suffer from anxiety, and I've suffered it for a fair few years. I've had a boyfriend now for a few months. I haven't told him yet.

So when I get anxious I tend to text him quite a bit and I've noticed that his texts are becoming less flirty. He has got a lot on at the moment so I am hoping that it's just that.

My question is how can I tell him that I suffer anxiety without making it sound like an excuse for needy behaviour.

Please help me, I really love this guy and don't want to lose him.

xxx

View related questions: flirt, text

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A female reader, [?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] United States +, writes (22 January 2017):

[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony auntIt's not an excuse, anxiety isn't something you can help that you suffer from. I am sure he wouldn't mind you telling him. I don't know much really from your situation from what you have described. But if he cares about you and loves you, he will do it for you despite you dealing with anxiety. When we're with someone they either accept us at not only at our best but also at our worst, or they don't accept us at all.

Let him know about this, it's better to let it out rather than to not contain it because eventually it will implode and the outcome won't be pretty. Deep breaths, my love. You got this in the bag and I hope you feel better. Anxiety is brutal, I battle from it too. Take it day by day and remember the technique..

"List five things are around you right now?

List four things you can touch

List three things you can hear

List two things you can smell

List one thing you can taste"

You don't have to do it, you can simply write it down in a journal or even talk to a therapist in your local area. Your partner is someone who should be there for you when it's all said and done. I wish you the best, let me know how everything goes.

<-- Rate this answer

A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (22 January 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntWhat do you mean by anxiety? Do you mean you worry when you are apart from your boyfriend and need reassurance? Is it a jealousy thing?

I wouldn't make a big deal of this. If you have managed to conceal it from him for months, then it obviously isn't too severe. You obviously have a handle on it and have your own coping mechanisms.

When you are both relaxed and together, just casually mention to him that, sometimes, when you are apart, you get a big anxious and just need a reassuring text from him. Tell him it is something you try to control and that, although you realize he has a lot on and don't like to bother him, sometimes just a text from him can make all the difference to how you feel. If he cares for you, he will try to help.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "How can I tell him that I suffer anxiety without making it sound like an excuse for needy behaviour?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0312883000005968!