A
female
age
36-40,
*l66
writes:hello, I had met my soul mate when I had been on holidays, although we were both expecting nothing of it at first but a summer fling, we both fell in love. He had proposed to me, and I came back home the happiest girl. Its been 4 months long distance, and we have been going very strong. He is currently on holidays from university and started a job, he is 20 and is staying with his parents whilst he is on break. Recently his mother has been having a lot of issues in her own life, basically she is scared of losing her son and thinks that he spends too much time talking to me etc. she has made a huge mess (calling my family etc.) and given him the decision of either his family or me(she threatened to leave his father if he sticks by me, because his father will not let her kick their son out)He wants to hide our relationship from her until he is independent and then start our own life. (and confirms to me he will never leave me and loves me alot) Im not sure what to do, Should I break up with him, and let her have him?
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fell in love, long distance, on holiday, soulmate, university Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (31 August 2008):
Well she sounds like a right nut job, but since you are unable to get her help it looks like her nutty ways are here to stay.
Since your relationship is long distance I'd say go with what he's suggesting. She's going to go to bed at some point and then he can go online and chat to you. As a single guy he is going to go out so as soon as he's round the corner or at a mates house he can call you.
He'll be back at uni soon and then it won't be a problem any more. Also suggest to him that he suggests to his dad that he buy a puppy / kitten for the psycho-mum to dress up and dote on since your boyfriend has committed the ultimate crime of growing up and getting a girlfriend.
Also....You say its going strong and you were going to marry him, but you were willing to just give him up at the first sign of trouble... that says to me you should think about if you really want to spend forever with him? This is hardly the greatest problem in the world that a couple has ever faced. It's going to get a lot harder than this.
Good Luck!! xx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2008): His mother sounds not very nice for putting him in such a situation but really what he proposes doesn't sound all that bad. He is choosing you but not giving up his family - what could be better? Even though his mother hasn't been very nice no one wants to lose their family.
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