A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 2 years has told me that he has already changed his will although we are not married yet to make me a beneficiary (along with ather beneficiaries).I have a will as well (predating our relationship) but have not made him a beneficiary and I did not plan to because I wish my godson to inherit. The thing is I don't know if I even believe him because he has often said things and not done them or not even meant them or said them after a few drinks when you can't believe anything, so I don't know if it's true but I did not pursue the matter because it makes no difference to me whether I am a beneficiary or not.The problem is I get the impression that he sort of expects that if we get married spouses should be one anothers' beneficiaries.How do I go about explaining my (different) opinion to him? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (24 January 2012):
 Being a VERY suspicious person by nature, I smell a scam,be carfull and watch your back.
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (24 January 2012):
 Leave your will as it is for the moment. If you do decide to get married, then surely it is up to you as to which of your assets you leave to whom?
If in the event you change your will, then later you and the bf part ways, and you just dont get around to amending your will, he will inherit
So for the moment, leave your will as it is.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2012): If you are not interested in anything he might wish to leave you. And you cant really rely on him to be telling the truth about this. Then if i were in your shoes, i would explain i wished to leave everything to my Godson and invite him to leave his estate to someone else of his choosing...with your blessings.
He cant be upset about that without it looking as if he is only with you for what he might inherit!
And if you do marry, as already mentioned. Check that your will is still current.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (24 January 2012):
 If you decide to get married please check the legalities because as it stands now, in England and Wales, marriage will automatically revoke a will as it is presumed that upon marriage, a testator will want to review the will. A statement in a will that it is made in contemplation of forthcoming marriage to a named person will override this.
You don't need to take my word for this, I suggest you seek professional legal advise ... or use google!
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (24 January 2012):
 your will is YOUR WILL, wether married or not, you dont have to change or update it just because you marry. The reason why anyone makes a will is to inform the law who YOU want to benifit from your death.Also I would not tell your partner who you intend to leave your belongings or money to, as it sounds like there is not much trust there. Why is he so interested in your will? it sounds a bit suspicious to me.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2012): Hi I just checked the laws for the UK as to wills, and it states that if you do marry then you need to make a new will as your circumstances have changed and under law your spouse must be provided for in the will. Until such time as you do marry (if you are planning to marry), you don't need to change your will at all. For your own piece of mind I would suggest you look into the lagalities of your will and what laws are in place for married couples.
For now I would simply explain your position in this matter. If you already live together though, there may be laws in reference to certain things in that instance also, so I would check it out just to be sure.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (24 January 2012):
If you think he should know your feelings on this you need to sit him down and tell him straight. Let him know that you drew up a will before you met him and that you have no plans to draw up a new one.
He might push for information on who your benificiary is, but you are under no obligation to tell him. However, I would check the legalities if you do marry, I seem to recall reading in Australia marriage alters the situation and new wills are required if the spouse in not to be the benificiary. I would imagine the UK to be the same.
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