A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have known my boyfriend before we were a thing for about a year..he was shy at that time too..but now we are in a relationship and dates seem really awkward..I mean when he texts he's not shy but when in person he starts to blush and stays quiet..what can I do to make his shyness go awaw..I mean he is only shy around me..everyone elsehe is fine..while texting. No shyness there but when we are even 10m from each other he just runs away. I want to have a proper date before he leaves for his college. What do I do..??
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 December 2016):
 He is still not himself around you. Have you both just started dating? If you have then give it time. But you are both adults and if he keeps running away from you and not able to communicate after say a couple of weeks then I would suggest breaking up.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2016): Shyness is a tough thing, you can't get over it in one move. You should make the moves if you want to push things alone, but don't rush them.
There is a good thing to try, though you might not see results for a long time- suggest things for you both to do (dates, kissing, sex etc) but try to word it in such a way that you can claim it was his idea. It's not easy, so maybe ask your friends for ideas- but this way, he might gain more confidence, as he believes he is the making the moves.
Either way, I believe the days where men should only make the first move are long gone- if you want it, go get it!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2016): All you can do is give him time, which sounds like you dont have much of. But if you are mean to him or try to push him if he is not ready to be more comfortable around you then he might completely shut down and not trust you anymore. I know because i used to be very shy and it took me time to get over it. I only became comfortable with those people who were patient with me and who earned my trust. Its all about trust, he probably is afraid to look stupid around you or thinks you might laugh at him or something. give him time.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2016): Maybe he wants sex but he's afraid to tell you. It's so much easier for a man who feels that way if the woman suggests it first.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (6 December 2016):
 I don't think you guys are a great match for each other to be honest. You should feel completely comfortable and natural with your partner, you shouldnt have to force anything.
How can you have a relationship with someone who's scared to talk to you?
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (6 December 2016):
 "what can I do to make his shyness go awaw".... I understand where you're coming from, but I actually find this a little mean because it's part of his personality. I'd be very surprised if it wasn't because he really likes you and gets shy on dates.
If you don't find it endearing, as well as potentially slightly challenging, I'm not sure why you're with him. Let him be who he is and, assuming it is because he really likes you, appreciate that he feels that way. If you can't make it work with who he is, maybe you should date somebody else.
Shyness should fade in time, but I think you need to try to stop viewing it as a bad thing you need to get rid of.
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