A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My partner broke up with me by email on Monday. I had no idea it was coming and I'm still in shock - heartbroken. Although only 5 months - this is 5 months out of my life which I value.His email told me that some relationships last and some don't. I was the best partner he had ever gone out with and thanks for that! He would also like to stay friends.I never got the opportunity to have my say or tell him how hurt I felt in the manner in which he told me - Should I write a letter to express how I feel or just don't bother??? I'm not looking for a reply from him, just recognition that I expected more.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2008): All of the replies have been extremely helpful and true. I’ve decided to send that letter and reason is because I deserve respect. I have given him my love and emotions and much more and those 2 things needed to have been treated with care. He has made all the decisions. Regardless of whether he replies – I will have my say and that is all I want. Thanks everyone x
A
female
reader, sarcy24 +, writes (2 July 2008):
 What a terrible thing to do, although talking to other people it seems a very popular way of dumping someone. My hairdresser who is 22 has been dumped three times like this! Absolutely disgraceful. I know you want to write him the letter so I would go ahead and do so as it may make you feel better. I would not expect any answers from a man like this though and it may even bolster his ego but hopefully it will give you some closure. I don't feel you will get any answers to any questions so maybe just tell him about how you feel and don't bother asking for any answers to anything.
I think it is good that at least you found out relatively early what kind of person he is so at least you are not wasting any more time on a person like that. Very shortly someone new will come along that you like and this moron will be instantly forgotten.
Write your letter, tell him what you think and then forget him.
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A
female
reader, pashanoodle  +, writes (2 July 2008):
 I wouldn't bother to email back - I doubt this guy would take on board anything you might write about his low treatment of you, let alone your feelings. To break up with you in such a manner tells me he lacks feeling, lacks insight, lacks maturity and maybe quite a few brain cells too!
I can imagine how hurt you must feel - and confused by his actions, but unfortunately this is one of those things that I don;t think you are ever going to understand. That's why I don;t think you should waste any more energy on him!(If you do write - Ask old sister may be right, get it all down on paper but don;t send it, just vent and then start to heal!!)!
I hope you get treated the way you deserve very soon my friend!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2008): Good riddance! What a coward. You can be happy it was only 5 months and not 5 years.
That said, I know you are hurting and yeah, you have a lot of anger and frustrations bottled up inside you; infact your emotions are in turmoil;
I suggest you write a letter; tell him how you feel; what you think of him and well just get it all of your chest;
HOWEVER, I suggest you do not send the letter to him immediately; let him wonder why you are so quiet; also read the letter tomorrow again, make changes, read it on Friday again, make changes if you want; and then on Friday afternoon, if you feel like it, send the letter to him;
Chances are by then he would have made contact again;
Be strong; don't let him get the better of you; you are worthy of much better!
Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2008): Erm, it would probably hurt to much for you to cut all contact with him. But at the same time it would hurt if you watched him with other people.I suggest that you do write an e-mail back, partly because its what you want to do and also if he replied back it might make you feel a bit better about it.Obviously read the other Aunts and Uncles advice a - your ex was coward doing it by e-mail. If you were his best then he would've done it face to face surely?!I can dictate what to write, because I don't really know what you feel (angry etc) but I suggest you just let everything out. That way you've got everything off your chest and you'll feel better, which is number 1 priority.
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (2 July 2008):
 Yes absolutely. Tell him exactly how you feel, make it clear you dont want a reply but dont let him get away without feeling too much guilt as he didnt do it in person. He has taken the cowards way out and is doing the its not you its me thing. You are obviously better off without him although you wont feel that way now.
Tell him you dont need to stay friends. It rarely works anyway and will only cause you pain if you still love him.
You will feel better in time and you need the closure by having your say to achieve this. I hope you have a better future with a decent guy. x
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (2 July 2008):
He dumped you by EMAIL!?!?!?
What a sad pathetic little boy. You are far better off without any man who doesn't even have the guts to talk to you face to face.
You should email back and tell him how you feel, and how you thought he was a better person to treat you this way at the end. Tell him your happy memories will now always be tarnished by the fact that he's a gutless coward.
Then cut contact and never speak to him again.
What an idiot. You deserve better than that and I have no doubt that you will find your next relationship makes you forget the last one in minutes.
Good Luck!! xx
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