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Had a great date last night but now this... shall I just forget it?

Tagged as: Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 August 2012) 6 Answers - (Newest, 30 August 2012)
A male United Kingdom age 36-40, *astor troy writes:

So i went on a date last night with a lovely girl. We met on a dating site and i went to pick her up and met her parents so they knew i wasn't going to kill her and dump her body in a ditch somewhere.

She was telling me that she had some pretty awful ex boyfriends, one was a midget! for real... I am a children's doctor and im no George Clooney but i am good looking and very good with talk and it was a great evening... we went to a bar and she said she had never been taken anywhere like that. All night she was playing with her hair and her necklace and sat really close to me and when i dropped her home she kissed me and wanted to meet again tomorrow. She then text me when i got home.

So all good right? Well that's what i thought...

I text her good morning when i woke up for the gym and i figured she was sleeping. But i have looked online and she's been online on the dating site and my female friend is friends with her on there and she asked her how our date went and she said " he's a real gentleman and very good looking and shes hopefully seeing me tomorrow, but she's just not sure if i want to be single or not"

I called her at 11.30 am and no answer, i didn't even get a text back. It's almost 4 hours later now. Shall i just forget this?

Sound silly but i don't want to take thing further with someone who isn't sure... i want to be the guy they know right away that i'm that guy, you know?

Just don't understand why she wouldn't be sure depending she was with a convict and a midget before. Lol.... its quite funny in hindsight but not sure what to do from here...

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A female reader, oldbag United Kingdom +, writes (30 August 2012):

oldbag agony auntHi

RELAX! You've had one date with a girl who has had a few bizarre dates.Just ring,thank her for a nice time and ask if she'd like a 2nd. Don't contact again if she doesn't pick up the call or is undecided ~its her loss!

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A female reader, Ciar Canada + , writes (30 August 2012):

Ciar agony auntI have to agree with SVC and the anonymous male reader. You've only had one date. It is WAY too soon for either one of you to be sure. And it is entirely appropriate for both of you to continue to go out on dates with others until such time as you are sure about each other.

The courtesy of a response (from her) would have been nice, but there may be a reasonable explanation.

Don't contact her again. The ball is firmly in her court.

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A female reader, Daisy_Daisy United Kingdom +, writes (29 August 2012):

Daisy_Daisy agony auntIf she's had some awful boyfriends then maybe she's not used to a nice guy when he comes along. I think you should wait to hear from her and hopefully just enjoy the second date. I agree with the other poster that it's not realistic for someone to be totally sure after one date; maybe that's where she's gone wrong in the past and she's holding back a bit. I think you should try not to dwell on it too much. See how and where it goes. Good luck!

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A male reader, MajorDisplayerOfInternationalPlayerBehavior United States +, writes (29 August 2012):

MajorDisplayerOfInternationalPlayerBehavior agony auntGet your game on man, ignore her. Especially if she's blabbing about exes on the first date, and then not replying to you.

If the body language was there and she wanted a second date, maybe she was willing to give you some loving on the first date.

Especially seeing that she was right back online searching the next day.

I would give the same advice as anonymous and say, do not text or call too much. One time is plenty, then wait it out. Do not show anger or frustration. That seems needy or desperate.

She will contact you once she realizes that she can't get under your skin. Good luck.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (29 August 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntyou've had ONE date how in the world can you be sure after ONE date?

FWIW I dated a little person back in high school... I was before my time I guess...

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2012):

I would chill out. It's only been one day since you first met.

I wouldn't worry about her being online. If you receive a message or whatever, curiosity would still make you log on and see.

Don't try to text or call too much. Leave her with a text saying you really enjoyed the evening and it would be great meet up again. Then leave it.

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