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From talking to her friend it looks as though she wants to stay in touch.

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating, Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 August 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 22 August 2007)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, *ndy00 writes:

Hi all. Something troubles me. *For those of you who don't know my situation, go to my profile, it explains everything there*

So, as you know, me and my long distance girlfriend of 2 years broke up about 2 months ago, and within the past couple of days, something has happened that is making things unclear, and is probably giving me false hope.

One of my ex's friends has started chatting with me on MSN messenger. Turns out, she hadn't heard the reasons behind the break up. My ex has obviously been keeping it a little under wraps. So I explained things through, and she felt for me.

Here's where it gets a little wierd: Over the past couple of days, she has revealed that my ex has said that she has considered inviting me to her 18th birthday party on the 30th of this month. The only thing holding that back is that she wouldn't want me staying at her house. She believes that would be arkward.

So this gives me the impression that she would like to see me, but wouldn't like to get too close to me.

Another thing her friends has done is invite me to a party on New Years, and invited me to London whenever her and her boyfriend come down for a holiday. I get the feeling that she is trying to get my and my ex back together.

I believe that she thought that we were very good together, and now wants us to get us back together. I keep saying that; no matter if I go up there, or she comes down here, there is still gonna be distance (and lots of it) between us.. But at the same time, this is giving me some kind of hope, and I'm not sure I need hope right now. I honestly can't see us getting back together, but now there is a small part of me awakening that is saying:

She wants to stay in contact; She doesn't want to lose you

And therefore, there is still a glimmer of hope that won't seem to die inside of me.

Please tell me what you guys think. Many thanks!

View related questions: broke up, long distance, msn, my ex

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A female reader, Butterflyfly United Kingdom +, writes (22 August 2007):

Butterflyfly agony auntIf your ex truly wants you she will let you know.. dont waste your time in this whirlpool of tormenting thoughts... if she wants you but she only gives you this sort of clues , is she really worth the salt? how can you want someone in your life but not really do anyting to get them, apart from letting other poeple do the work for you, like dropping hints to friends, etc? what klind of perverse games are these? but i suspect there is a lot of wishfull thinking on your part.. if it is for you to be together you will be.. but don't watse your time Andy lingering on the past...................... she knows where you are, she will find you if she really wants you two to work. it's probably hard for her too to get through this but it really seems like she has taken a decision and she is truly stinking with it. Now I say you deserve some hapiness and peace of mine and perhaps someone else who can understand you better.xx

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A male reader, Andy00 United Kingdom +, writes (21 August 2007):

Andy00 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Andy00 agony aunt..I seem to be getting less and less help from people. I mean, this has been up here all night, and I've only had 1 answer (thank-you, flower girl). What am I doing wrong?

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A female reader, flower girl United Kingdom +, writes (20 August 2007):

flower girl agony auntOh Andy Andy,

See what i mean you go on holiday and hardly think about things then WHAM, straight back to reality and now you have a friend making things worse for you (although I'm sure that is not her intention).

Listen you are getting used to the fact there is probably no chance of you getting back together, so why babe are you prepared to put yourself back a notch with all this she is still thinking about me.

She probably is you were together a long time but it does not mean to say that she wants the relationship back.

OK so the friend wants you back together but if that is not what she wants then it's not going to make a lot of difference now is it.

You are obviously fun to be around after what i have seen today and you clearly have a lot of friends so why the hell don't you just get yourself back out there and have some fun and try and meet someone else?

Mail me if you want to talk.

Take care.xx.

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