A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My wife is convinced that I have had multiple affairs. I have never had a physical relationship with any woman, man, or animal outside of my marriage. Nothing I say or do has or will convince her that the affairs never happened. Today she calls me on the way to work to ask what we need to tell our son. So I guess that means I should be expecting divorce papers. My question is this, how can I convince her the affair never happened and how do I save my marriage?
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male
reader, PeterPan +, writes (26 January 2009):
 Get into couples counseling ...now! Assuming all you say is true, then she's jumping to conclusions without any evidence. If you can get her to agree to speak openly about why she thinks you're having an affair, then it will do you both some good. Also, this might be a smokescreen for other issues in her life that she's manifesting on you (self-esteem, loss of a job, a sense of betrayal elsewhere than her marriage, death in the family or something else traumatic). The only way to get to the bottom of this is to find out if she has facts or if these are all feelings... and deal with either (or both) openly.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): If she's got the thought of you having an affair this far into her head I doubt that you'll get it out again, and there's no way you'll convince her otherwise unless you get a polygraph (lie detector) test done. If that's what you end up doing, make sure she takes the test as well and is asked the same questions she asks of you.
Do you really want to save your marriage? It would bother me to have a wife with such a paranoid character.
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