A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I know that in our culture, sex is made into a large part of life, from what we see in movies, to what hear in music, there's no getting past it! so my question is, does anyone wait until marriage anymore? I firmlybelieve that waiting is the best option. does anyone else? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2010): Nothing wrong with waiting to have sex. I know of a girl back in college who was 19 at the time and she slept with anything and everything. Needless to say she contracted an STD that changed her life. So the decisions you make now will affect you later on in your life. There are long-term consequences to any decision and it is best to be ready for it.
I am 25, and still a virgin. I know it is rare for girls my age to be this but I do it for religious reasons. By no means am I a Holy Roller, because I have lived out in the world and seen how crazy people are just because they want to have sex. I made the decision and I have stuck by it. Contrary I find that most guys who wanted the sluts and the whoes when they were younger, want the pure good girls, now. Why should I settle for something that has been used, when I know that there are men out there that feel the same way I do.
All I can say is never let anyone else make the judgement for you. It is your life and your body, and you should do what you feel is right. I personally cannot stand the thought of knowing that someone has been with this person and that person. To me it seems like you are sleeping with all the other people that he/she has been with. I applaud you on waiting and never let anyone pressure you and make you feel inferior. Sex is not everything, and the media tries to portray that as everything. If anything, stay the way you are and when you find that special person, may they feel the same way too. Best wishes to you!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2010): I didn't wait, and I wish I did. I was 17. It's very difficult to understand how significant, and complex sex is, even for those of us who have experience with it. I'm 26 now, and I've been in committed relationships, and I still wish I had waited. At the very least, wait until you absolutely cannot resist, like you're starving and sitting in a room with your favorite food. Don't force it. Don't do it because you're curious, or want to feel more grown up, and please, please don't do it because you feel some kind of obligation. Your perspective is going to change a lot in the next few years, and you'll undoubtedly make huge mistakes, which is ok - it's how we learn. But if I can give you any advice, please try as hard as you can to be be honest with yourself about what is right for you, and remember that nobody your age can make more informed decisions than you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2010): There really is no right or wrong answer to your question.
A person needs to decide what is right for them. Some people don't ever want to get married, but want to have sex. Some people want to wait, while others don't. There's nothing wrong with any of these choices as long as you're okay with what you're doing.
For people that choose to have sex prior to marriage - they should know exactly what they are risking - chance of unwanted pregnancy, diseases, emotional upset...& they should know how to protect themselves - birthcontrol pills, condoms etc...
For people that choose to wait - they again have to be ready for that. Knowing how they will resist sex when the opportunity comes, not knowing what your potential partner will be like, etc. Some people choose to wait for religious reasons, or for moral reasons or for good old fashion romance of losing your virginity on your wedding night.
No matter what is decided, as long as one is happy with their decision, then what is decided is a good choice.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): In my opinion, sex is healthy. I don't want to wait! I want him now! Though, me and my boyfriend waited 1 year before we did it, to make sure it was the right thing to do, and we are still together.
Waiting is your choice, do what you feel is the best thing to do. If you don't want to have sex before marriage, then don't! You're not alone. :)
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (5 November 2010):
 There are still some people who wait. There's also some evidence that waiting until marriage decreases your odds of divorce (thought that comes from the Heritage Foundation, who have a definite conservative bias, so take it for what it's worth).
The biggest argument I could see for waiting is this - you can always choose to start having sex with lots of people (especially if you're a chick), but you can't undo past sex. Best to wait until you're certain before you get with any one person (or more), at least until you can make an informed decision.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): People definitely do decide to wait until they're married. Both me and my boyfriend made that decision and we're both 16. Even though waiting isn't the popular thing to do, I honestly think that people should wait until they're old enough and stable enough to support themselves as well as any of the consequences sex may bring about (i.e., pregnancy, STIs). However, I think the most important thing is to wait until you're ready and with someone you love and trust. A lot of my friends have said they wished they waited and they wished it was with someone else. Sex is a very big step in your life and your relationship, and when you look back on your first time, I don't think it's something you should regret.
- Nathalie
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A
female
reader, Anonny  +, writes (5 November 2010):
For many years I wanted to wait until marriage before I had sex. However even up to my late 30s I never met a man I wanted to be with who shared the same view and now I'm sleeping with a man who doesn't want to even GET married!
Good luck with your wish! - I only wish it had happened for me too!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (5 November 2010):
 There is no overall wrong or right thing to do. There is a RIGHT and WRONG for each of us. If you believe waiting til marriage is RIGHT for you then stick to it, own it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): I am 25 years old male and I am waiting to have sex until I am married. So you are not alone.
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female
reader, Enzian  +, writes (5 November 2010):
 Yes there are and it's worth it!
If you look at the right place, you will find people that don't think what the world is saying about it! People that si something special in it, which should not be given to just anyone!
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): Absulutly yes there is alot of girls who want to stay a virgin and movies or music does not mean any thing and if they do it that does not mean that we have to do it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): my brother is 23 and with a long term girlfriend.
they love each other but they don't have sex.
mainly for religioud/moral reasons.
everyone is different.
you just believe in what you want to and don't be swayed by the world lol.
for the record i am the opposite to my brother. as i said, were all different :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): You're definitely not the only one. If you make friends with the right crowd of people, you'll find that out firsthand, and you'll likely meet someone who shares your beliefs.
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A
male
reader, Universe Man +, writes (5 November 2010):
There's good reason to wait until you're in love, or at least in a relationship with a lot of trust in it. I don't see much reason to wait until marriage. What's the difference between the day before your wedding and the day after your wedding? Nothing, really. A piece of paper in your county courthouse. If love and trust and commitment come before marriage--as they should--then marriage is essentially a legal arrangement.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): Everyone was raised different so in some households if u do not wait you are doing the wrong thing but in others it is close to encouraged you should do what u feel is right and I feel that waiting until marriage is my best choice aswell
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): I did, and I was 26 when I got married. I'm very glad I did! I would say I know of probaby 5 other couples who waited, but I know a lot more who didn't.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2010): I applaud such a young person to think in such a manner. I find this question very mature for your age and Im glad you bring it up. Yes, by no means let society rule your judgment, if you believe in something stand by it even if its contrary to popular belief illustrated in film or books or mags or whatever. Youre a smart girl and waiting til marriage isnt a bad idea at all! Just dont get married to just have sex as Ive known of women to do that and their lives are miserable cause it was based on a physical need not permitted by their religion before marriage. Good luck :)
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female
reader, dmartin89 +, writes (5 November 2010):
 My boyfriend and I are planning to stay unmarried..so if we waited we would never have sex :-P
We had sex early on in our relationship and are still very happy and together two years later. I don't think that there is anything wrong with sex outside marriage.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 November 2010):
 Well everybody has there own opinion and there own beliefs nobody is right or wrong in what they think if you ask me, good for you if you are willing to wait and am sure that there is many other people along with you that are wanting to wait until they are married, you are not the only one so dont panic.
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