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male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: How long should a person expect someone to wait on them if they are in the process of a divorce? Is it fair for the one waiting to date someone else?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (18 May 2009):
 Emily's answers put it perfectly.
It's the "oldest" trick in the book of cheating married men, to tell the woman they wish to date "on the side" that they are going through a divorce. Then as the years go by the divorce still isn't final..
As I see it I would NEVER date a guy who wasn't totally and absolutely out of his past relationship. Preferably I would not date a guy who came straight out of a marriage. To me when that happens it seems like they just want a replacement for the wife they divorced, someone else to take care of them.
If he is still legally married, then I can not see why you can't date someone who isn't married. If you want to wait for this guy to become "available" then that is your choice, but to put your life on hold waiting on his divorce ( which might or might not even have been filed) is just not for me.
I would make sure he was over and through with all the drama that most divorces entail, before jumping into a relationship. I wouldn't want to be his "therapist" and having to hear about all the troubles they had. That is between him and his ex-wife.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (18 May 2009):
We have so many girls on here who are dating married men and waiting YEARS for them to "finalise their divorce.... he just can't see me yet as it will mess things up and blah blah blah blah.... he says he loves me."
Yeah, never happens.
So my advice is to say to you and the girl that who ever is going through the divorce is STILL MARRIED until the paper work is done and signed.
You should never tie yourself to a married person. Keep in touch but don't wait around.
Once they are single again then they can look you up and start dating you. Until then don't get too attached.
Good Luck!! xx
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