A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My ex have been communicating with me in getting back with me for over 6yrs. After 6yrs I began to notice the type of changes in him that I wanted back then.Now I traveled to go see him. We got tipsy first night and had sex. Well now I'm back home and really don't feel good about our meeting. He has not called me either. Other than me texting him to let him know I arrived safe. It's like everything he was saying was not matching and I got caught up in a fantasy.Could this guy have possibly taken advantage of me at my weak point? He was really persistent non stop for years to get me back. Was this some kind of revenge? I feel used and I'm really getting angry to the point where I want to call and give him a piece of my mind.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWiseOwl You are too funny. No I am not up for the part at all and I will make it very clear to him that I got caught up and will really like for us to make it clear what we want from each other moving forward because the worst heartbreak will definitely be the one with an ex you actually love and adore.
The sex was not that great when we dated and I was curious to see what has changed. And it was the bomb. I am ok with parting ways if my feelings are not the same with his. It's all good. We live and learn that even your ex who was climbing mountains to get you back can play silly games.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2014): Careful with your feelings!
Keep them on reserve. You might just be auditioning for the leading role in the drama, "Friends With Benefits." You've made it to the casting couch.
Are you up for the part?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell he called and has been texting all day today. Don't want to bring any serious talks yet. We will see where this goes. I'm not waiting around though.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2014): How can you say you feel used when you had six years to discontinue contact? You made the conscious decision to meet with him and spent the night.
You again confirm advice that I've offered over and over to people about getting over their exes and moving on.
I have also commented about the pain that resurfaces for people trying to maintain friendships with an ex; if they haven't gotten over them completely. This is what happens.
If the sex was good, chalk it up as closure to the past; and forget about it. If he hasn't responded, you see he hasn't changed. Perhaps you can move on once and for all.
It's not revenge unless you feel it is. Otherwise; it was buzz-sex with an ex.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2014): you are not used!you wanted to have sex as he wanted it,so you got it! it may looks odd because it was too soon, you even didn't know what you expect from meeting him.To start a relationship ? to just see what the potentials are? and instead you had sex!and now it doesn't feel right.you can wait to see which direction this relationship will take.If it was me I would contact him to see what he says, at least you get an idea what is going on..good luck
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (2 January 2014):
 It could be that he got cold feet after, it could be he just wanted you to "want" him.
I would not call and give him a "piece of your mind" either. You were a willing participant with different expectations then he had.
I would however go absolutely no contact and let him go. There was a good reason you two broke up way back, and to restart something without the past somehow making it's presence known is hard, almost impossible. I would venture a bet that 9 out of ten people who go back to an ex do it because the ex somehow seems familiar and "better the devil you know" instead of looking for someone who you will be better suited for and with.
His loss, honey. Don't beat yourself up. Instead see it as your GOOD BYE to him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't understand. How many times what has happened? To him or me? Don't get it. I just dont understand how a grown man will waste their precious time plotting for years for a get back. This is really killing me inside. Trust nobody. I have him more credit than that. I always compared my relationship to what we had and praised him for being the best boyfriend. Now all that praise is gone to waste. He is at the bottom of folks I will want to forgive now. This is just plain pathetic.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 January 2014):
 I would go NO CONTACT and live an awesome life. that will get him back.
DO NOT contact him... do not give him a piece of your mind...
LIVE well and make him regret losing you by showing him how awesome you are without him hanging around your neck dragging you down.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 January 2014):
I'm afraid I agree with SageOldGuy is right. This has happened before, and will happen again. Let it go, though. If you call and give him that piece of mind you're looking to give, you'll end up giving him the satisfaction of knowing that he hurt you.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (2 January 2014):
 One would need a very large calculator to determine how many times this has happened.....
Good luck...
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