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Boyfriend accuses me of cheating all the time, does this mean that he is likely to be cheating on me?

Tagged as: Cheating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 December 2011) 9 Answers - (Newest, 7 December 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hi everyone this is more of a question really, my boyfriend is always accusing me of cheating even though I'm not, I've never cheated on anyone in my life. is it true what people say about the one that accuses you of cheating are usually the ones doing it themselves? was just wondering cos my boyfriend goes off sometimes for ages if I text him he ignores me. thank you

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A male reader, Capri2 Argentina +, writes (7 December 2011):

There is no rule for that. But there is a good chance, I guess. Unless he is far too insecure.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2011):

I had this with an ex and it became clear she was not going to win a honesty award.

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A male reader, eek United Kingdom +, writes (7 December 2011):

eek agony auntmy exgirlfriend did that to me. Turned out she was cheating and had been for months. (thus now my ex)

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (7 December 2011):

Honeypie agony auntIt's not uncommon that "cheaters" accuse their (faithful) partners of cheating - a good defense is a good offense type deal.

Also it seems like he has some rather serious trust/insecurity issues.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (7 December 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony auntI have never had this happen to me but I am sure that there are many cases of POT.KETTLE.BLACK. going on.... it may just be that he's insanely immature and insecure.

OR he could be cheating... but just because he goes off "for ages" without texting does not mean he's cheating...

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2011):

If you have not given him any reason, then he is likely to be comparing you to himself. Is there an individual he believes youre cheating with or is it at random?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2011):

I have had this experience in the past, years of being accused of cheating..but he was the one who was doing it not me!! Guilt transferred.

It doesn't mean it's the same for every couple though, you need to be definate about your concerns, alot of men go silent just because they're doing something quite innocent like watching footy or working on a car with mates - just busy.

Ask him outright why he is always accusing you - was he cheated on in the past maybe?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2011):

It was true in my case. Iv never cheated never will. My (now ex) bf accused me of cheating and many occasions. Turns out he was the whole time.

Not saying this is the case, but it didnt end well for me!

Hope this isnt the case for you, goodluck

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2011):

Sounds like hes just really worried and insecure.

I say the same to my boyfriend but wouldnt dare to cheat, i wouldnt have it in me and love him a lot.

I think its bull for someone to say that and it means theyre cheating.

You need to just tell your boyfriend you would never cheat. You can't make him change his mind or stop saying it, it may be an insecurity thing but you can constantly reply with what you feel and hopefully in time he'll get the point its annoying you! (should take my own advice lol)

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