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AT 13, should we have sex?

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 February 2009) 9 Answers - (Newest, 27 February 2009)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

im 13 and so is my boyfriend.we are really deeply in love with each other.we have been going out for 4 in a half months.we both want to but should we have sex ?

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A female reader, PaulaS United States +, writes (27 February 2009):

Sweetie, you have so much of life ahead of you. Please think about the consequences if you do go ahead and have sex at such a young, tender age. There's a lot at stake here. Have fun being young for awhile first and wait until you have a little more emotional maturity and life experience. And remember the risks with sex. Babies, STD's, etc. PLEASE WAIT!

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A female reader, aunty_rach United Kingdom +, writes (26 February 2009):

HELL NO!

you are still a child. not to mention it is illegal! what happened if you fell pregnant or caught an STD? your childhood would pretty much be over.

save yourself untill you are older and ready for sex. at 13, kids are very immature and their bodies have only started to develope. therefore they are no way ready for sex. the ones who do have sex are just stupid! don't do it. you are still a child and should enjoy being a child!

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A female reader, -NothingLasts4ever- United Kingdom +, writes (26 February 2009):

-NothingLasts4ever- agony auntHonestly, I don't think you should. You're only 13. You might well love him to bits but having sex with him is a big deal. Your body probable isn't ready asnyway.

So no, I don't advise it.

x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2009):

What's the rush? Don't believe what t.v. shows say...it's all a bunch of fantasy on what it's REALLY like for teens, and most feel it was too soon. You'll have decades to experience sex when you become a woman. You could even hurt yourself, so love your body and protect it. You can have so much fun being your age: Start dreaming of things you want to do or try...anything from sports, drama, cooking, movies, scrapbooking with your favorite pictures, talking to boys:), cheerleading, making your own money...the possibilities are there for you, go ahead and give some a try.

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A male reader, ArmyMedic United Kingdom +, writes (26 February 2009):

ArmyMedic agony auntNO! It's a very, very bad idea.

I'm sure you'd use condoms and be very careful, but seriously are you ready to be a Mother? Could you deal with do I have an abortion or not? Can you afford all the medical treatment and pregnancy tests? What would your parents say? And how will you feel when you are in your 20's and the guy you want to marry asks you how old you were when you lost your virginity, (if it's under 17-18 most guys will think badly of you)

I really don't want to have to answer your next question which will be "I'm 13 and had sex for the first time the condom split could I be pregnant?"

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A male reader, cupids_friend United States +, writes (26 February 2009):

Okay I am a 20 year old man and I am straight so don't get me wrong but I am very cautious about sex this will be your first time I say no I lost myn at 18 in highschool at the age at 13 your still in school if something happend you would not be able to also go to school it would hurt very bad and I am not saying that you 2 will not last but you do not want to waist it I am a guy and if I found out a girl slept around I would not touch her their is a million reasons why I could say no but if yall just want to make each other happy well then their are other ways than intercorce I hope this helps if not and you have any other questions please let me know

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A male reader, justadvise United States +, writes (26 February 2009):

I can't believe you want to have sex at 13. 13!!? that's way too young. I know you don't want to hear "NO" but you will be glad you that you waited till older. Trust me if we (as guys) care enough about you we'll wait too. If your bf doesn't then he wasn't worth it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2009):

First and foremost, if you have to ask, then definitely no.

Second, you're 13. No matter where you go and where you live, that is an illegal age for sexual activity.

Third, you want to get pregnant? OOoh, I can just see it now, a month later at DearCupid: "He used the pull-out method, but my period is late. Am I pregnant?"

[sigh]

Lastly, at your age, you're more prone to physical ailments/illnesses than when your body is more developed. At 13, your body is still very young and still going through development.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2009):

HELL NO! I know adults will tell you that you should save sex for marriage, and that you couldn't really know what TRUE love is until you are older, while that may be true, or not, what they never told me was that once you have sex, something is TAKEN from you that can NEVER be replaced. And you may not realize it until you are older, but you will feel the effects from the first time. You'll wonder what is wrong, but you'll justify it by saying you're in love and all... But the fact that you are asking the question shows you are not ready, no matter how bad you both want to. SEX is only beautiful when you give it as a gift, and you truly don't understand what that gift is until you realize how unique to you and precious it is. It's a gift that we as women, aren't even physically prepared for until we are in our 20's when our cervical cells mature (see HPV, and cervical cancer). Trust me if I could turn back the hands of time, I would be a virgin at 31, instead of losing it to my fiance at 17. Take your time...there is no rush. When you are responsible for your own well being in every way (economic, spiritual, emotional, mental) then go for it! And men aren't there until much later than us, 30's even. You'll be glad you waited...at least till you are 20.

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