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10 years younger boss: Is he trying to fight the fact that he may be attracted to me?

Tagged as: Age differences, Friends, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 November 2011) 8 Answers - (Newest, 12 November 2011)
A female United States age , *aliCal writes:

I am 56 years old and I look good for my age.

I work with a lot of guys, and I am friendly with all of them.

But, my BOSS makes me feel uncomfortable. He avoids looking at my eyes... when I try to talk friendly with him, he repeatedly tells me that, "We will never hang out together outside of work," (as though he THINKS I have a crush on him, ok, I do), but yet, after 4 months of working there...he gave me a promotion.

I sometimes see him smiling as he is looking at me, and sometimes I see him looking at me as though he is really impressed with me, from the corner of my eye. He is about 10 years younger than me.

I don't know what to think of this. I am confused. Do you think that he is treating me this way because perhaps he is trying to fight the fact that he may be attracted to me?

View related questions: crush, my boss

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (12 November 2011):

Honeypie agony auntEh, does it really matter if he has a crush or not? I highly doubt you got the promotion cause he fansies you, if so, he really shouldn't be boss...

He is your boss, keep it profesional and classy. And maybe there is another promotion in sight.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2011):

"I sometimes see him smiling as he is looking at me, and sometimes I see him looking at me as though he is really impressed with me, from the corner of my eye. He is about 10 years younger than me. "

Or he could be thinking, there is that woman 50-something year old woman who still has a crush on me...he might just be impressed with himself rather than you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2011):

"I sometimes see him smiling as he is looking at me, and sometimes I see him looking at me as though he is really impressed with me, from the corner of my eye. He is about 10 years younger than me. "

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A female reader, CaliCal United States +, writes (12 November 2011):

CaliCal is verified as being by the original poster of the question

CaliCal agony auntNo... I do not want an office romance. It just isn't a good idea. I KNOW. And yes, he is the kinda guy with a huge ego. Besides, I just broke up with a younger man, and I will NEVER date someone younger than me again...no matter what!

I recently met someone online that I am interested in meeting. (Who is a few years older than me)

I just wanted some input about This situation. THANKS EVERYONE! :)

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (12 November 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony auntdoesn't matter. He is your boss...

if he was NOT your boss, then it's NBD about his age

the issue is HE IS YOUR BOSS

if you want more, get a different job.

perhaps he promoted you because you are good at your job?

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A female reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx United Kingdom +, writes (12 November 2011):

xTheAlmightyDuckx agony auntThe only thing i can think of is maybe he is full of himself? And he likes the idea that an older women has a crush on him.

I personally do not think he has a crush on you as he made that kind of clear when you were speaking to him.

Is he arrogant at all? Or maybe abit up himself? Also the way he said "We will never hang out together outside of work." Kind of gives me the impression he assumes that you like him without you even telling him.

He just sounds like a bit of a sleaze ball who thinks that all the women fall at his feet.

I am sorry if i have totally misjudged the situation but it just sounds that way to me.

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A male reader, Daniel the love doctor United States +, writes (12 November 2011):

Daniel the love doctor agony auntWhat do you tell him to make him say "we will never hang out together outside of work"? How is his tone? He may be fighting his feeling of attraction, and may be his ethics when it comes to dating/talking to a co-worker or employee. *And by him saying the above statement, he may be trying to talk himself out of talking to you for those reasons.

I would normally advise to stay away from office romances/dating because the negatives heavily outweigh the positives in that situation. But you're a grown woman- and you can make your own decisions.

But whatever decision you do (or the both of you) decide to make, make sure it's a wise one.

I wish you the best of luck!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2011):

trust me do not get involved with your boss. keep work life and home life as two different things and make your boss know that 2

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