Should I go back or move forward in my life?
Q. I think i may still be in love with my high teacher. For some reason its like i cant move on and go through college without feeling like something is missing. I am not the type of girl that will cry over this or be depressed i just want to go back ...
A. 11 November 2009: It is always a mistake to go back.... (read in full...)
Why does no one want to kiss me in spin the bottle?
Q. Ok, what to do what to do: I am going on a bus tomorrow with guys. It is a soccer team so both teams are going usually we play truth or dare or spin the bottle but when it comes to me almost no guy wants to kiss me. It is not that I am pretty. ...
A. 11 November 2009: One of the secrets kept from young people is that blokes can be scared of attractive young women. They think they couldn't possibly be worthy. Find a nice young man and reel him in.... (read in full...)
Who is right in this situation?
Q. Hey everyone, So i was with this guy for 3 months and he got close with my best friend. Anyways I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me so i broke up with him. The very first person i told about this was my best friend. I came crying to her and ...
A. 8 November 2009: At your age you will probably have quite a few boyfriends before you settle for one. Since you weren't going out with him your friend probably thought he was up for grabs. This can be hurtful. I would give her some space for a while and hang with ... (read in full...)
Busy with sick mum for a week so my girlfriend ended it!
Q. Here is the situation, and thank you for reading this and possibly giving me some advice. Me and my girlfriend have been together for a few months now, and we usually spend everyday together. If not then we talk on the phone often and text. I am ...
A. 8 November 2009: I think your mother is just an excuse she picked up on. Sadly she isn't in to you in the same way as you are into her. It's hard but lick your wounds and find someone more deserving of your love and affection.... (read in full...)
I don't know where to start trying to repair this friendship...?
Q. hi, months ago i fell in love with a girl completely, she had a boyfriend she did things with me... weve recently started uni and stupidly whilst drunk (i know thats no real excuse) told her sister what i had done with her sister. The girl who i di...
A. 7 November 2009: You have just been given one of life's lessons. It's tough. You need to be able to maintain confidences, particularly with friends. Now you are paying the penalty. There's no easy way back. I take it you have already tried flowers and a sorry no... (read in full...)
Is this older man playing me?
Q. I have been dating my bf for almost 8 months now. He is super sweet and tells me he loves me yet I haven't met his family or vise versa. I am 21 he is 34, he keeps saying that our families wouldn't accpet our relationship. In the begining I...
A. 7 November 2009: What do you think your next step in this relationship might be? If you are going to marry or move in together it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks. If not then you must ask yourself how this relationship is going to progress. Do you both ... (read in full...)
She stood me up. Does this mean she's not that into me?
Q. There was this girl who i worked with for a few months, she had a boyfriend at the time but we had a good friendship always having fun working with each other, she quit a few months later and she stopped talking/txting me for a while, but she came ...
A. 6 November 2009: It could be so many things. She may have lost her phone for example. Could you get a friend to ring her or txt her and see if it is just you she is ignoring?... (read in full...)
My past tells me to be cautious
Q. I posted previously about this attached guy who is flirting with me. So a little update, he isn't with this girl, they are actually separated at the time. So, heres my problem. I really like this guy. We talk everyday, all day. I'm getting really c...
A. 6 November 2009: As long as you go into this with your eyes open it seems worth a shot. Trust has to be won so over time you will come to know how far you may extend trust to this man and in what circumstances. Go in one foot at a time. I hope he makes you very ... (read in full...)
Is this older man playing me?
Q. I have been dating my bf for almost 8 months now. He is super sweet and tells me he loves me yet I haven't met his family or vise versa. I am 21 he is 34, he keeps saying that our families wouldn't accpet our relationship. In the begining I...
A. 6 November 2009: I have to ask why he thinks his family wouldn't accept you.... (read in full...)
Arranged relationship -- where do we stand?
Q. One of my parents friends from another country proposed for his son .. I am in Canada. My dad told his dad that we have to get to know each other, so we started chatting online and I told him, if he wants to know when I am going to marry him, his ...
A. 6 November 2009: Anyone who writes supporting arranged marriages no matter what the culture is voting to disenfranchise women. This practice is a wholly outdated form of behaviour. It is often continued due to religious observance. I have to question why most if not ... (read in full...)
My former best friend not only made a pass at my girl, he grabbed her butt!
Q. Ok on my birthday my former best friend not only made a pass at my girlfriend but a couple of hours after he left we were sitting together and she told me that he grabbed her butt. Now what would should i do??...
A. 5 November 2009: Just ignore it this time. She may tell him it is unacceptable and that she will be telling you every time he tries it. Sometimes people do the strangest things for a variety of reasons. It may have been a one off.... (read in full...)
Arranged relationship -- where do we stand?
Q. One of my parents friends from another country proposed for his son .. I am in Canada. My dad told his dad that we have to get to know each other, so we started chatting online and I told him, if he wants to know when I am going to marry him, his ...
A. 5 November 2009: I think your expectations of a relationship based on what your parents think and chatting on line are wholly unrealistic in modern society. I am not surprised he has ducked out. ... (read in full...)
Help me with my play please, I need ideas.
Q. Hello everyone, I need some ideas for a play I will be doing in a group.The teacher put 6 people in a group to act out behavior. The leader of the group choose to make our play on the different behaviors in a restaurant. So there are 6 parts for ...
A. 5 November 2009: It is better for you if you try to do your own homework. In this case the play isn't 'the thing' to misquote Shakespeare. The act of trying to come up with a credible plot is the test for you of your imagination. Just give it a go.... (read in full...)
Is his text evidence that he is cheating?
Q. I saw my boyfriend texting this other girl, and I thought nothing of it until I caught a glimpse at the end of the text, and he wrote love you to her. I know that she is not a family member and he told me that he was talking to a guy and not a girl. ...
A. 2 November 2009: Like many of us, when confronted with hard evidence we refuse to believe it. We try to turn ourselves inside out thinking of other explanations. Your instinct is right.
What is wrong is the dishonesty. He can say I love you to as many people as he l... (read in full...)
He likes me a lot more than I like him... how can I let him down gently?
Q. A guy i've never met added me on facebook about six months or so ago. For some reason i accepted him, we had no related friends or anything and his profile said he lived nowhere near me but i just left it and didn't say anything. I soon recieved...
A. 31 October 2009: Just tell him upfront that he's not your type. Men can accept that. You can then flatter him a bit and even go as far to say you appreciate his friendship, but end by saying you aren't looking for any kind of romantic entanglement. Straight forward ... (read in full...)
How do females get labeled?
Q. hey ok question most girls seem to think because your not having sex guys wouldnt call u a slut...or any sexual preference of any kind... is there anythi ng else females can do that they can get labeles as a slut?...
A. 30 October 2009: Perhaps you are mixing with the wrong crowd. It can be difficult changing your circle of friends. You should be with people who respect you no matter what you do in your private life. It is also worth bearing in mind that men who use phrases like ... (read in full...)
I am not happy in my relationship so should I leave?
Q. i have a fiancee that had a relationship with his first cousin and they had kids together 3 and one died. when i first met him he had a picture of his cousin in his wallet, after we started our relationship, i told a few of my friends about him and ...
A. 28 October 2009: No European country prohibits marriage between first cousins. It is also legal throughout Canada and Mexico to marry your cousin. The U.S. is the only western country with cousin marriage restrictions.... (read in full...)
He hit rock bottom after we split up and we are meeting again for the first time this Sunday. How do I play it?
Q. hi i split with my ex 10 months ago, after a passionate intense 6 months relationship, we had moved in together, i realised he had a serious alcohol problem, i know a lot about that issue, he had stolen money off me before, we were sharing money but ...
A. 26 October 2009: Until his problems with alcohol are resolved you should stay away. Help him to AA or whatever and then let him sort his life out. Alcoholics are destructive in relationships. They affect everyone in the family. If he is alcoholic do not start the ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my husbands depression? I feel more like his carer than his wife
Q. My husband has been depressed since 2005 ended, I've constantly tried and tried to seek help for him but he has so far refused to get it over the past four years. He keeps on insisting to me that September 2004 to the end of 2005 were the "golden...
A. 26 October 2009: You should talk to his doctor. Clearly he is clinically depressed and it is unlikely he will get better on his own. He may need a variety of treatments. Start with exercise.
His doctor may want him on a course of drugs but they don't suit ever... (read in full...)
I wear the pants....But if I don't he sure as heck wont!
Q. Hi all. My name is Lea and I am a 20 year old newly wed. I am really confused about my husband at the moment, and to be honest alot lately. I am really independant outside of a relationship. I took care of two parents pretty much my whole life wh...
A. 25 October 2009: You aren't going to be able to make him into something he isn't. You can explain your side and even set some limits but you can't, and shouldn't try to change his nature. This is a mistake too many women make. They promise they will never change and ... (read in full...)
Is this wrong for a Christian?
Q. Is my relationship with her wrong? So heres the thing. :) I'm 15. I've been told many times I'm extremely mature for my age. I've been best friends with her since we were 3. Every summer she's come and stayed with her family that lives here for ...
A. 25 October 2009: If you read your bible you will find there are more contradictions in its pages than anything else. So, putting religion aside, you shouldn't be having sex at your age because it is illegal unless you come from one of those regions where people are ... (read in full...)
Why is life such a cruel thing?
Q. i know this isnt my relationsip or anything! but i just cant help but worry, im only 17, i found out about 6 weeks ago that i was pregnant, and im now just 9 weeks gone, we was stupid, we made a mitake, not the best thing at this age, but me and my ...
A. 24 October 2009: Sorry to hear about all your unhappiness. You need to get your life back in order and you need support. I'm not sure whom you think you can talk to. It ought to be your parents but that isn't always an option. It could be your GP who can give ... (read in full...)
I am not happy in my relationship so should I leave?
Q. i have a fiancee that had a relationship with his first cousin and they had kids together 3 and one died. when i first met him he had a picture of his cousin in his wallet, after we started our relationship, i told a few of my friends about him and ...
A. 24 October 2009: You need to explain more about this relationship. What do you mean, 'Your friends couldn't believe what he'd done'? Why shouldn't he have a picture of his cousin in his wallet? It isn't illegal to sleep with your cousin in most countries.
But that... (read in full...)
Every time I try and talk to him about his laziness he makes me out to be the bad guy!
Q. I work 4 days during the week. My husband doesn't work. We have a 10 month old baby. When I get home from work, my husband passes the baby to me and goes to lay down. And this is after I've worked in a restaurant with no air conditioning, or I've ...
A. 23 October 2009: Have you talked to his parents about this? Clearly you need some help and he keeps dropping his end of the log. You need a sympathetic chat with them. You also need to have in mind what you want. If they are unhelpful then perhaps you need to make ... (read in full...)
How can I help those around me....and how can I help myself?
Q. Hello everybody. I have since realised that Im a confused man.I discovered this in my present relationship. I have been in this relationship for nearly four years now. I have read a lot on relationships, manipulation, deception, personality ...
A. 23 October 2009: Why are you afraid to let go of this relationship? ... (read in full...)
How can I convince her I am different?
Q. How do I make her understand I really Love her?? She's been with her bf for 4 years now. But she wants to break with him because he had broke her trust on him so many times and hurt her emotionally. Her bf would'nt allow her to break up with hi...
A. 22 October 2009: You are becoming embroiled in a situation that needs to resolve itself before you can hope to have a good relationship with this young woman. She needs to leave her boyfriend and get over it before you two get romantically involved. At the moment y... (read in full...)
How can I tell if I can trust him?
Q. Dear Cupid, Have been seeing a guy for over a year. We met on vacation (not the classiest of meetings I know, but has been more than a holiday fling) in a long-distance relationship. First he was very serious about me and asked to meet me all the ...
A. 21 October 2009: Very clever strategy on your part (please check for irony). Don't let him come to see you for eight months. That should help to build a strong bond.
If you are afraid of being hurt does that mean you care? If you care how will things get any bett... (read in full...)
Is holding out on sex normal when dating?
Q. I've been dating to meet the right guy. I don't put out until I know its right and we have the discussion to be exclusive. It seems after about 4 dates the guy doesn't call. What is the standard of putting out dating these days (I've been out of ...
A. 21 October 2009: I don't think the time and money spent should come into the equation. You are not a commodity to be traded at some yet-to-be-established value.
If you don't want to have sex than that is perfectly OK. When you want to have sex then go and enjoy it. ... (read in full...)
Is it really my fault he fell out of love with me? Where did this come from?
Q. I am 37 and have been married for 17 years with a 15 year old daughter. My husband had a breakdown 5 weeks ago and told me he didn't love me. Since then he has been to the doctors, one minute saying he doesn't know what he wants and saying he ...
A. 21 October 2009: I don't want to add to your confusion but I am slightly concerned that the previous writer is telling you to dump the last 17 years as if you were some duped teenager.
Your husband has had a breakdown. He hasn't just left with the floozy from the ... (read in full...)
I don't feel that he gives me the time of day. Should I take him back anyway?
Q. I need some advice please. Me and my bf have been ‘together’ for almost 3 years. We’ve been through a lot of things breaking up and making up again. The longest we’ve been apart was 2 months. I broke the relationship with him 2 days ago, I was so ...
A. 20 October 2009: I really think you have answered your own question. He doesn't fit with you. He wants a different sort of relationship. The one you have is driving you mad. And when you dumped him he got his mummy to call? Oh please! I think there is a lot of stuff... (read in full...)
Is it really my fault he fell out of love with me? Where did this come from?
Q. I am 37 and have been married for 17 years with a 15 year old daughter. My husband had a breakdown 5 weeks ago and told me he didn't love me. Since then he has been to the doctors, one minute saying he doesn't know what he wants and saying he ...
A. 20 October 2009: It sounds like he is having a full-on male mid-life crisis. What he has done will have a long-term effect on your relationship. I think you should look at how you are going to handle it. If he decides he has made a mistake what do you want? It can't ... (read in full...)
What do my horrible, recurring nightmares mean?
Q. i keep having reoccuring horrific nitemares. it`s so realstic. i prepare for bed and once i fall asleep in my dream a figure enters my room in the dark pins me down then rapes me. i scream and it feels so real. when i wake up it`s in fright. what ...
A. 15 October 2009: Have you asked yourself what you think it means? Are there issues in your life you are avoiding? Remember, everything in your dream is you. All the characters are you.
The subconscious uses imagery to try to get a message to your conscious mind... (read in full...)
What does her text mean? Does it mean anything?
Q. Heya fellas I recently broke up with my ex-girlfriend and need some help and advice. We met when we were both on vacation and stayed together for 10 days, then she left and came back to her country where 'luckily' i study there too. ...
A. 15 October 2009: You are becoming a txt stalker. She doesn't hate you but she doesn't want you either. You are trying to attach yourself to her and she doesn't want it. If she wanted you then you would be the first to know. Sorry mate! Suck it up and move on.... (read in full...)
I am in a LDR what should I do?
Q. I love my boyfriend and i think were deep but he lives in scotland and i live in north-england I'm not sure on the distance thing what should i do when i really believe i truly love him ?...
A. 13 October 2009: It's a tough one for you. You put your age at 13-15. Do you mean that you are 13 and he is 15? Please tell me he is not a lot older than you.
I think you should talk to your mum or dad, and if they agree, then perhaps you could spend a weekend at e... (read in full...)
He broke up with me because of his family
Q. I've been with him for 2 years and we broke up for stupid reason.He listen to his family, his family give him wrong advice me.Cause they don't like me.We fight everyday. So,I left him but I still miss him and I love him. I called him and tell him ...
A. 13 October 2009: I feel so sorry for you. You have trusted, and you have given up stuff. Now you are left alone.
Although this sounds hard, it is an opportunity and a test for you as a person. You have to be strong. You have to regain your independence. Hold your... (read in full...)
Is my depression the reason why I feel our relationship is going sour?
Q. I think im depressed and my bf isn't taking me seriously. he says that its all in my head and i need to just forget about things. problem is i can't...and isn't depression medical aswell...i know a bit about it and have read up on symptoms and ...
A. 13 October 2009: There are sites on-line where you can get help with depression for free. Search them out in your browser. Depression is real and afflicts many people.
You can be helped to find a way to deal with it.
If you still don't feel you can get out of t... (read in full...)
Should I go back to the person I first liked? Do I even like him anymore?
Q. I went on a group trip to Colorado and grew very close to a guy on that trip, who was 2 years younger than me. I started to like him a lot, but people got in the middle and when he asked if I liked him, I said no because I knew he wasn't ready to be ...
A. 13 October 2009: I think you should forget about dating for a while and take up some activity. Learn a sport, take an evening class, join a drama group - whatever seems slightly new and exciting - something perhaps you wouldn't have done before.
You can be too clos... (read in full...)
Don't know where we stand!
Q. At the beginning of this year I admitted I had feelings for one of my best friends, we're both female and have known eachother for about 3 years. She told me that she felt the same way and since then things have developed. At first she was always ...
A. 11 October 2009: I think you should talk to her. Find neutral territory and try to have a discussion that isn't too emotionally charged. Honesty is the best policy and it will be of value to you both in the long run.... (read in full...)
Why does he never see it from my point of view?
Q. Why is it that he constantly thinks I have something to hide or that I'm not telling the whole truth...then later I find out lil details he's left out and when I point it out; I'm over-reacting??? Or how everytime I just want to vent, he can never ...
A. 11 October 2009: Give yourself a break and get free of this relationship. Trust is the basis for all long-term partnerships. Trying to make this work will always mean you are playing catchup in his game. It's time to look elsewhere. ... (read in full...)
Advice for getting around girlfriends mum ?
Q. hi basically im completly in love with my ex who broke up with me today but it wasnt on our terms about 5 weeks ago her mum found out we were having sex and found out about a morning after pill had been taken she has completly flipped and ...
A. 10 October 2009: There are too many unanswered components in this. For example if you are about to go to college or take exams then a child would be more of a burden even though all children bring love with them.
Her mother may feel she is too immature to make the ... (read in full...)
I still miss my first love after 2 years... is this normal? How can I fix it?
Q. Drunkenly I've looked at an old girlfriends profile over facebook. We've not spoken for about a year and half and separated over 2 years ago... yet, having read that she's in a relationship brings up strong feelings of sadness and envy. Surely af...
A. 8 October 2009: Sorry mate - that's the beautiful scar we all carry - our first love. It's OK to feel that way - just don't keep scratching it. Get on with your beautiful new relationship.
Remember you broke up with your first love for a reason. It's easy to glos... (read in full...)
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