A
male
 ,
*oomoomoo
writes:Hi all, it's been many years since i've been back on this site and i've grown a lot since then. I'm currently 22, turning 23. I used to write a lot about one girl like 6 yrs ago.... whom i was very nervous around.... well 6 yrs of online chatting and just "chatting about random things" later.... we are both graduating our respective universities and she wanted me to come visit her before she moves into an apartment where she's not allowed to have guys over....well it's been set i'm to go next week and i'm not sure what to expect, i haven't talked to her on the phone or in person for 6 yrs + , only online, and she seems to be the type that is the computer nerd that is most comfortable with just online talk anyway.ive put off meeting her for a long time due to my own insecurities and depressive issues... such as being grossly out of shape, not taking care of myself during finals, or just straight up not happy with myself so i figured who else could like me? but this time i'm a little more prepared to drive the 2 hrs to go visit for the weekend (spent the night on a couch or something)shes very conservative person so i guess her inviting me over means she likes me? would a normal friend just do this?i'm so confused... i guess i'll find out when i go there, the old me would be a nervous wreck but over the years i've learned to "act", act normal, as if i'm not a nervous wreck.i think she wants to play board games and whatever rpg shes playing on the computer with me...oh yea and shes never had a boyfriend, and she was my first potential girlfriend in highschool, i asked her out but i stopped after a month or so because it was long distance, (cross town), but now that we are older i have a car and am mobile, and have my own place.... yea shes never had a boyfriend and shes 23... i guess im not much better off, i'm sexually experienced and good in bed, i am confident to say, but as to everything before that, im the same as her. i'm probably going to go anyway unless i really chicken out, but i just wanted to know what anyone thinks here, or if anyone could advise me anything.The relationship between us is very ill-defined. friend, close friend, or potential boyfriend? We never talk about these things as we're both shy, i'm considering maybe after visiting her i can see where i stand.... any support and input would be appreciated.
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long distance, never had a boyfriend, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (13 June 2012):
 I would go there with the outlook of spending time with a friend. That way you won't be too disappointed if she doesn't want sex or a relationship.
Just take it slow. She sounds like a girl who is a tad social awkward and inexperienced. She might simply be trying to get out of her "box".
The thing is, if you can't TALK about things, you shouldn't be doing them. As in if you can't talk about a relationship or sex, neither of you are totally ready for it yet (together that is). So again, just go slow and try and have a great week end.
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