A
male
age
30-35,
*arck jacobs
writes:Ok I dont want to come off as a jerk so please don't hate on me. My gff is 19 and a virgin, am I 22 and not one. We have been dating for 3 months and she says she still sin ready. I DONT pressure her, I don't want to hurt her in any way BUT it is killing me! We are together all the time, we have major make out sessions, complete with all out touching. We have done oral on each other, she lets me finger her just not sex. I want her first time to be special and when she is ready but I can only pleasure myself for so long. She has gotten me off by oral but I need more. I am being sweet to her but I don't know how much longer I can wait. oK I know that sounds bad but you have to see it from my point, we will be making out and SHE will get naked, she will be the one to start things. That gets a guy in the mood, nto to get into to much detail but literally jsut as we are about to start she says shes not ready and gets upset. I always tell her it's ok, and just cuddle her and tell her it's ok, but its liek hse is teasing me to see what I am going to do. I would never break up with her because shes not ready but how can I make her more comfortable so she is ready. and ladies how long did you hold off beofre just letting it happen. thanks
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male
reader, ashaw  +, writes (27 September 2010):
I'm not "hating on you", but you need to wait as long as she wants to wait, or move on. Three months is nothing...just wait until you're married. I'm not making fun of marriage either, but there will be times with pregnancies, health issues, etc. where you will go longer than that. You need to learn to enjoy everything else she has to offer before you'll fully appreciate her anyway. Don't rush it. You'll have fond memories of these times later on.
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (27 September 2010):
 Man, I don't mean this to sound like a hater, but going 3 months without sex is killing you? You sound a bit overly dramatic to me. Heck, my last GF would sometimes go that long between our sexual encounters. I'm not going to lie and say that I didn't hate that though...
Anyway, what you need to do is decide what is more important to you; Sex or this relationship. You need to prepare yourself to hold out as long as it takes if you really love her like you claim to.
One suggestion I would make is that if you feel like her getting naked and then stopping is teasing and causing problems, then you need to stop her from doing this. Especially if she is getting upset. That's a clear sign she's struggling. She wants you to be happy, but isn't ready, but is likely thinking that her stopping is making you mad. It doesn't matter what you tell her when she sees the look in your eyes go from one thing to something completely different. If you don't put yourself in this position, then you can avoid that rejection/let down.
She's also waiting because she wants to make sure she's in love. That's hard to know after only 3 months. Give it time. Be patient. Don't rush her. If you can't do that, then leave, it will be better for both of you.
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