A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,Me and my ex were together for 5 years and have two wonderful children. Recently we were going through some financial problems that required me to move back home with my parents for the time being, i have moved back with our kids and he stayed back working to save up. We were separated for three months but within those months he came when he could to see us. But the root of our relationship problems started when we were still living together. A while back a new person started working with him and he was in charged of training her and that caused them to become real close. Well, their friendship started slow and then it become from talking at work to talking every chance they had. He had to call her on his commute to work and back and then before they went to bed. He hardly spoke to me and when i confronted him about it he told me that he talks to her in the morning to stay awake and that i don't barely spark up conversations like i used to. Then the arguments started and i told him that i didn't want him talking to her in my house, so he began coming home late or going out to get things in order to talk to her. While this is all going on, she knew that what she was doing was bothering me and kept calling him all day, everyday. Then around that time that’s when the whole financial problem came to surface and we had to move, during that time he was telling me that i shouldn't worry about her cause he loves me and he'll never cheat on me and that me and the kids are his world. Then when he came for the last time to see us before we moved back home with him, he had took me out to eat a few days before my birthday since he was not able to be with me for my birthday date. On his last night we had an argument about the girl again and i admit it was my fault but then on his way back home i called him and that was when he told me that it was over between us. We broke up two days before my birthday and still are until this day. He told me in order for us to get back together, i would have to be his friend again. We're still having relationships together and all but we are still broken up. My question is why is he telling people that we aren’t together anymore if he said he wants to make it work. Also should we make it work again and is it still worth it because i do still love him a lot in spite of the disrespected he showed me.
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at work, broke up, get back together, my ex, spark Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Just Saying +, writes (6 October 2010):
 Five years of being together is a long time and you do have kids with him, In a way I agree with him that you would have to be his friend first. If you stop and think about it, you can flirt with him and get to know him again, try sparking his interest again.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 October 2010):
 Ok well he's telling people this because at the minute he does feel like he is single, am guessing when he said he is wanting to be friends with you first that he wants to take things slowly, either he has cheated on you or else he is tired of you feeling that he has. So i guess maybe some time apart would be good for the both of you at the minute, i guess the bigger strain right now is that you dont live together anymore so that makes it harder, you need to have a heart to heart with him, sit down with him and ask him does he want to be with you? tell him you are not going to wait around and that you need to know were you stand, tell him you love him and want to make it work but that you want him to treat your feelings with respect and you feel like he talks more to this girl than he does you and that it hurts your feelings tell him he needs to make an effort. Goodluck
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