A
female
age
30-35,
*umafruit
writes:I've been seeing this guy for about 4months now, and we can go days not seeing each other with minimal boring texting to days spent together and really happy and intense. He will never tell me if he wants to see me, I always have to be the one to ask/text first, which makes me feel uncomfortable and like he just isn't interested.I'm 19 and he's 26, this is a first for me but he seems totally at ease about it and is confident it isn't an issue. I'm still on edge about him interpreting me as an immature needy young girl who needs reassurance, which to be honest I do...I hope he just acts like this because he doesn't want to come across as clingy/irritating, but I can't help but just feel unwanted, especially when he texts his mates constantly even around me.And he's never verbally effectionate, the furthest he's got is telling me "I care about you", once he mentioned he misses me as soon as I'm gone, but then why doesn't he make more of an effort.
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male
reader, Reggie2  +, writes (26 October 2012):
He's a selfish git and no manners either to text friends when he is with you which is a way of saying you are not that important to me...or see I have many friends(which I bet he hasn't).
Take a deep breath and never never text him first again and in the meantime find other interests do a night school course on a subject that interets you .Join a club.
Get a life for yourself.You will become more interesting yourself you might even join a charity stop thinking about yourself and think of others.There IS someone out there for you just believe inyourself first.Do something for you,and before you know it He will appear.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (24 October 2012):
 stop contacting him and see what happens.
IF he doesn't get in touch in a reasonable amount of time then you know that aunt honesty is correct, he's just not that into you. BTW whatever you deem reasonable is fine but for me if it was a guy that I was supposed to be dating regularly and until this point we had regular contact, I'd say 5 days or less especially if up until this point we had spent every weekend together and if you have plans over the weekend coming... wait for him to contact you and firm them up...
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 October 2012):
 As the saying goes 'He is just not that in to you'. I know that sounds harsh but it is the reality. He will meet up with you if you make arrangements but he does not bother to take the first step himself, it shows he is making no effort and he is just going with the flow. It shows that he is not serious about you and he can take it or leave it when it comes to spending time with you. If I am honest with you I would not look at him as a long term partner because I just do not think the urge is there for him. Talk to him about it see what he has to say for himself. If he still refuses to make an effort then I think you have your answer. Good luck.
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