A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes:Why does she think I will be old and lonely when am older? kinda hurt.?I met this older friend at work and there was this guy there that liked me and I liked him.I left work for college now. But the guy has stood me up 3times and I've deleted his number and moved on. He texted me the other day but I didn't reply.I told this old friend of mine. She's in her 30's and she said I shouldn't cut him off cos he might be the one and when am old (am only 21) and lonely she won't want to remind of this guy that I cut off.Why does she think I will be old and lonely? Am a nice girl, friends say am pretty, am sweet and I just want a nice guy for ones and am gunna keep it moving till I find him.Why is she been like that? She asked me if she can ask for his number and chat to him see if he's seeing anyway. I said I don't care, she said she'll find out who he's seeing. (They work together)She's 31, been with her bf for 11years no ring, no kids. She pays for food and rent, bills. I don't want that when am her age.Thanks...x
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female
reader, ScaredForLove  +, writes (11 November 2011):
Well, things like this happen to me a lot. I'm gonna guess she's jealous and maybe likes the guy. Or she's jealous of you period. Don't worry about what she said, she could also be worried you'll get married and have a better life married, before her. I wouldn't put to much thought into it. Probably just jealous :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2011): Take no notice of her, you did right to finish with the man, he had his chance and blew it.
Your 'friend' is maybe projecting her own life on to you, thinking thats how she would end up if she split with her man.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (11 November 2011):
 I honestly dont know why she would say such a ridiculous thing to someone so young, she clearly has low self esteem and possibly feeling frustrated in her own relationship therefore she is projecting these feelings onto you.
At the end of the day you did the right thing to cut him off, he was messing you around, he is a jerk and you can do better. In fact ending up old and alone would be better than ending up with him!
She must just have different views on relationships to you, it sounds like she would accept this kind of behaviour if she was single which indicates that she has low self esteem and doesnt care if men treat her like s**t.
I would try and ignore the comments, or if you really feel that upset then tell her she really upset you and you are supposed to be friends and friends shouldnt behave like this.
But try not to worry, it is her problem not yours. You are so young to be told you are going to end up old and lonely, after all there are millions of men out there so you are not going to struggle to meet someone eventually! Settling for someone who treats you like crap is never the right thing to do, so you are right to cut off guys who mess you around so you can focus on meeting a nice guy who treats you right.
But one thing that does worry me - what is this 'she pays the bills, food and rent' comment all about? Is there something wrong with a woman paying for things?! What century are you living in?!
Yes I would also be annoyed if I had been with my boyfriend years without a proposal or children, but I will always pay my own way in a relationship because I have a good job and I like having my own money, I will never rely on a man financially.
Perhaps this could be the reason you cant meet a nice guy - it sounds like you are looking for a sugar daddy who can pay for everything for you, so with that attitude you will never meet the right man.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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