A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:It seems like my bf is constantly picking fights. when we first started dating it was that he had problems with my sexual history (which isnt bad), then it was that he didnt like me talking to any guys even friends, having a facebook account, wearing certain clothes now he doesnt like me going out or hanging with friends, or drinking socially.it seems like he will get over one thing, just when i think the relationship will improve he will find a new thing to start fights about.he is never satisfied or will never make sacrifices in our relationship, when i have stood by him through so much and try to support his therapy.will this guy change? its been 2 years!
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (7 February 2010):
Here we are two years later, and he hasn't changed. In two decades, he won't have changed. He's had problems with your history, he's had problems with your facebook account, he's had problems with your clothes, he wont' let you drink and I'm sure there are other things too. He's destroying everything you are. Get away from him.
A
male
reader, bharat mehta  +, writes (7 February 2010):
 ' ITS BEEN 2 YEARS !!!! and you are hoping for change? Most certainly you love him dearly.
If your ability to suffer, allow you to sustain this fighting relationship, then I don't think it is that much bad. He may possess some good quality, that will not allow you to take a break....that much I can think about your question.
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A
female
reader, Tigerlily  +, writes (7 February 2010):
Sweetheart, from what you've said it sounds like your man is VERY controlling. You need to watch out for that. If his "picking fights" gets you to change your behavior then thats a successful tactic and there is no reason for him to change his ways. First he gets you to stop talking to other men, then change what you wear, now he is moving on to trying to separate you from your friends. Controlling men do this so that you will be cut off and completely dependent on him. It's subtle, be careful.
It sounds to me like you need a healthier relationship with someone who respects you for who you are, and will support you wearing what you want and being friends with who you want.
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