A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Why do younger men fall for older women? This keeps happening to me, and lately a relationship with a man 9 years younger is getting quite serious... I am worried that this is just a passing fancy. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Cake1011 +, writes (28 January 2008):
 I just want to say that for any man -- young or old -- you have to worry about long-term potential and feelings permanence. If this person feels like the right man for you, stay with him. Something may come up in the future (It's possible for any relationship), but as long as you continue to love each other and be loving towards each other and always communicate with each other, you should be fine. If you ever have any problems, couples counseling is the way to go.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh, this gentleman has plenty of money, we both do. Yes, I am fit, pretty and fun, successful and independent. I do not really want kids, but do want to be in a stable relationship with a man who loves me. I look much younger than I am, and men my own age are usually not fit, or married, or have issues, and I simply do not seem to attract them. But I still worry about the permanence of their feelings, and the long term potential.
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A
male
reader, Jamer70  +, writes (23 January 2008):
 I completly agree with Yos and all his ponits.
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A
female
reader, Sams_WonderWoman +, writes (23 January 2008):
 Younger men fall for older women because they LOVE them. It is not a passing fancy, so don't worry about it.My son married a woman 12 years older than him, and couldn't be any happier. He was married before to a much younger girl, and she met another guy at work who she left my son for. He then met this wonderful woman who treated him a lot better and was more in-tuned to him and his needs. He told me that older women are not as fickle as women around his own age or younger. Age is just a number, it's how you feel inside and feel about the one you love that really matters!!
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH + ♥, writes (23 January 2008):
 You lucky Girl. Just enjoy it I know I bloody well would.
Take it as you still that attractive to get one. Just dont think of it as long term, and if he loves you and stays then its a bonus.
XX
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (23 January 2008):
 Basically , it is about money.The older woman would pay for his upkeep. He is like a kept man.
Older women are not too demanding and do not expect much from the man.
In 10 year's time , you will be old while he is still young...
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A
male
reader, Yos  + ♥, writes (23 January 2008):
 Several reasons that I can think of. Note, these are all big generalizations!
Experience: older women tend to be more sure of themselves and more confident. They know what they want more in life, and in love too.
Independence: more self sufficient, stronger and less needy (in some ways at least).
Sex: usually more uninhibited, better at communication and more aware of their own bodies and sexual response.
Those are good things, these are not:
Impermanence: it's easier to see the relationship as not having long term potential (as you mentioned). This takes the pressure off, especially if the man is commitment-phobic (and many of us are).
Being 'mothered': they do say men fall in love with a woman who reminds him of his mother. Sometimes that can be a little 'too' like his mother...
No marriage / kids pressure: above a certain age its no longer an issue. Of course this can run the other way, I've seen on several occasions women with younger boyfriends run into big problems because they've been together for years, but when she reaches mid-thirties he's still 'not ready' and they have to break up. Result: the woman is single in her late thirties with very little time to find the right man if she wants kids. This happens more than it should...
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