A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I dont get it....There's this guy who asked me out and asked was I single etc... I said I was and he met up with me.I knew him just from being in a club I'm a member of. He obviously took a shine to me. He then tells me he has a gf away he had in college. been together about 5 months. Which he hadn't told me about before. He has still been texting me and meeting me although he has her. He says he thought he would be single by now (hoping I guess).She lives 400 miles away so he sees her very little.I dont get what I am to him though? He says he wants to see me and really likes me etc. haven't seen him for 2 and a half weeks though since we kissed and got closer.Is he feeling guilty and keeping away or has he just used me? I dont know as he doesnt seem a bad guy in fact hes really nice.I've asked him does he want to see me and he says yes. but I dont want to be involved with him if he's in a relationship as I'm not like that and have told him so, but we have this great connection.Please... what should I do as i think i have fallen for him! x
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (2 September 2009):
Yep, tell him to tell his girlfriend about it.
I know you really like him but remember that if he is capable of cheating on her then chances are he'll do the same to you.
He either has to split up with his girlfriend by the end of the week, or leave you alone.
Don't be this girl! You know you are better than this.
Good Luck!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 September 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoh crap!
after all i said yesterday i eded up sleeping with him lastnight. i dont know whats up with me but i realy like him.
i must put an ultimatum to him now ye?
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (1 September 2009):
Yey!!
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI think all you guys are right that i have to keep away and be tough with him.
Especially emilt thanx thats made me feel more empowered. x
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (31 August 2009):
 Maybe he wants you to be his FWB ( Friend with benefits) - which means someone to hang out with and have sex with when he can't see his GF.
Honestly I would back away til he has figure out what he wants. ( Or til you find a single guy who knows how to commit)
Good luck,
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A
male
reader, Mr Castillo +, writes (31 August 2009):
You should put on the brakes as soon as POSSIBLE. I'm sure she felt the same for him the same way he's been after you like he was after her. You're not his beggining and you're sure enough aren't his ending. Too many men out there with an honest heart and mature priorities to be stuck on him. Not to be so brute.
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A
female
reader, CupidGirl826 +, writes (31 August 2009):
First thing, whether they lived together or she lives in another country, he has a "commitment" with her.
I understand that it's not a marriage but it's some level of a commitment. And unless he ends it with her first, he should not be meeting other people.
He violated that - meaning, he doesn't know what commitment is. You're worth better than sloppy seconds. He's not a man. He's still a boy. He's still playing the game.
It shows a lot about his character.
I'd tread lightly with this one, heartache may be up the road for you.
Good Luck
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (31 August 2009):
Right, he needs to get this sorted.
He clearly hasn't got the balls to sort it so if you want him for yourself then you have to get tough.
Tell him that you think he's great and you really really like him, but you can't just be his friend and you refuse to go out with him while he has a girlfriend because it's not right.
Tell him to call her and end it, and when he's done that then he can give you a call to let you know.
He'll say it's not that simple and make all kinds of excuses.
But you HAVE to be strong. You have to cut contact with him and go out with your mates and have a GREAT time with them. Fill your time up so you don't think about him.
If he calls you back to say they've split up then you can start seeing him again, but treat that as your first date. Don't rush into anything.
If he doesn't call then you know he's a gutless weasel and you can walk away with your head held high knowing you did the right thing and you are worth more than that.
Good Luck!! xx
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