A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend, early 30s, is a successful entrepreneur. We have been together three months. Over the past month, his workload has increased quite a lot and I've only seen him twice. First time we had dinner at his place and he was exhausted but I could tell he was trying. Second time I asked him to dinner which he agreed. He cancelled day of then immediately changed his mind and said he could do a quick dinner. We only spend a couple hours together bc he was tired and needed alone time. He texts me every few days to see how I'm doing and vice versa. However when I text he either replies immediately or not at all. I'm so proud of him but still feel lonely sometimes. In person he's very affectionate and trying but when we're not together it feels like I'm single.I'm usually very independent and live my own life. I'm successful as well and busy with friends. But it's getting difficult trying to tell the difference between him being busy or disinterested. I know he's stressed and I want to be supportive. He split with his business partner a month ago and is doing all this on his own now. He even won an award recently and I'm happy for him. His schedule can be unpredictable (client meetings) as his energy level. He sometimes works weekends and cannot plan dates too far ahead.Can anyone share their thoughts and experiences on dating a busy person? Sometimes he's very loving, and other times I feel lonely even when sitting right next to him. Because his mind is constantly thinking about his business, or he's doing something business related on his phone. He's an amazing man and I care for him quite a lot.
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2016): Thank you.
He was very affectionate and chatty in the beginning. Now he's either drained or went back to the "real" him. He did get everything thrown at him at once, so I guess I will see how the next couple months go.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2016): I dated a busy guy once, he was busy with his hobby which took him out of town on weekends. He had a bunch of male friends that he liked to hang out with, and basically I would get the odd night here and there. He was funny, he was handsome, he was charming, had money but what he didn't have for me was time. And that's just kind of the most important thing in a relationship. Or at least it was for me.You are in the honeymoon period. Or should be, so what you're getting at him now is likely close to what he's able to offer. I understand that he does have the extenuating circumstance is about the hassles of the job his career and the split with his partner so perhaps give him a couple of months to we settle his schedule. In the meantime continue being busy with your friends don't be available every time he calls you, he does need to learn that you have your own life and make your own plans. Don't cancel plans with friends if he suddenly becomes available. See how it goes for the next two or three months, and then write back on your progress and we can see how things are going for you.
...............................
A
female
reader, singinbluebird +, writes (15 June 2016):
 3 months equal out to only about 10-12 weeks of dating. Its so fresh, why not keep dating other men? Keep him in your schedule but also open up your life to other men too. He just sounds far too busy to be with someone tbh, texting everyday is sweet and he does sound interested but I dont think your needs are being met. As its such a new relationship, I wouldn't put all my eggs in one basket. You also didnt state if you guys have been intimate either because you can easily tell by intimacy if hes a person youre sexually compatible (which is an important part of a relationship)Continue to meet men. Have fun, date, and go out with your girlfriends and enjoy life. Dont wait around for him to show up but when he does, let him know youre allowing him into your life and its special and he shouldnt take it for granted. He's busy but he shouldnt let relationships that matter fall way side. Good luck
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2016): Thank you. He definitely has a business with plenty of info online, high ratings, no recently won a public award. He has a physical office as well.
...............................
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (15 June 2016):
 This is a new relationship, so try not to invest too many feelings too soon. This does sound like someone who's just incredibly busy, rather than he's not interested. Most business owners are constantly busy, so you have to figure out if that's something you can be okay with, if you continue this relationship. It will be hard because it's difficult to want to spend time with someone and they don't have much time to spare, but that's often the life of a business owner, especially when he's adjusting to having to cope on his own. I know it's a bit cynical and I don't want you to get paranoid, but does he definitely have a business?
...............................
|
