A
female
age
41-50,
*IERIN
writes:Hi everyone!So I have a BF (5months now). We have a great relationship and we love each other. I know he is the one - I never felt this way for anybody and he saiz the same.The guestion is ... When do you think is a good time to start living together? I just mooved to another place (he is not alowed to be there w me), so now we have to be in his house (for the night) whenever we want to be together. He lives w his father (doesnt pay a rent or anything else). Its kinda getting on my nerves. I am old enough to live on my own and he is the same age, so I think he should moove on and start living the "real life".I would really love to moove out and try living together,but he saiz he is not ready yet. I understand we have been together for a short period of time, but is he ever going to wana moove in w me, when now he has everything he needs and doesnt pay a dime for it? I don't know how long should I wait.Is a year a good waitting time???I don't want to push him into something, but at the same time, I don't want to loose all my precious time just waitting for something to happen - have to help it a little.So ladies ... any tips?Thank you all
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female
reader, LIERIN +, writes (31 October 2007):
LIERIN is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks guys!
About the money guestion : He does make really good money on his own. He could easily afford living on his own in a really nice appartment ... I just think he is not ready. So I will give him some time and we will see whats gonna happen.
xoxo Lierin
A
male
reader, Uncle Trev  +, writes (31 October 2007):
Doesn't sound as if he is ready regardless of how ready you are. Also if he is unable to pay his way how is he going to support half the cost of running a household?
People move in together when they both feel ready for it - sometimes it can be five days other times it can be five years - it just has to feel the right time for both parties concerned.
The problem here is that I honestly do not think your boyfriend is ready for this and I do not feel he is going to be ready for this at least for the foreseeable future.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (30 October 2007):
 Hi,
I really dont think you should look at it from a time perspective, more of when its right.
Moving in together changes everything, either for the better or worse. I'm of the opinion of sooner rather than later as you dont want to wait 5 years, then find the guy is a slob who expects you to wait on him hand and foot.
However, this is something that you cannot pressure someone to do, if your bf is in the comfort zone at the moment ( he has no financial pressures living with his father ) then the added financial burden of moving out could be a factor. A lot of young guys also worry about their girlfriends "changing" when they move in with them ( the age old worry about the girl wanting marriage and babies instantly). The best thing is to reassure him that you will be moving in with him to strengthen your relationship not to tie him down to marriage and kids at the first opportunity. At the end of the day, when you are ready you are ready, I would give it another year of so and after that he should be able to commit either way.
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A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (30 October 2007):
 You have to wait till you are both ready after 5 months you still hardly know each other give it a year if you still feel the same (or are still together) then think about it, moving in together is a huge deal i was with my ex 2 years before we moved in together it lasted 6 months because everything changed he turned out to be a control freak and it was worse when we had to live together and see each other 24/7 enjoy your relationship dont rush into anything you have loads of time to live with each other why rush it?
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