A
female
age
26-29,
*urple rain
writes:ive been with my boyfriend for 2 years, we live together and we're very happy, but when i go out and get drunk i am violent towards him. I dont know why, im not at all like that when soba and there is nothing wrong with us. He has stuck by me and wants to help me, but ive done this 10 times now and i dont think he'll be around if i do it again. I wouldn't blame him for leaving, he deserves better. The only way im dealing with it is by not drinking at all but my boyfriend doesnt want me to never drink again, he just doesnt want me to be violent.I dont know what to do. Help
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, lola80x +, writes (5 January 2009):
Hi I was in a similar situation to you and my bf eventually left me. either give up the drinking for a while or find a low alcohol drink that does not get you really drunk that you lose control.
My problem was I would not remember a thing or why I became that way. I would wake up with no memory and just know I did something bad.
I only wish I took my own advice before it was too late.
Funnily enough I never ever got that way with friends or family it was just my bf. I think it stems from relationship insecurities that resurface when Im drunk. Maybe there is something on your mind that you need to talk to your bf about.
A
male
reader, roadman +, writes (31 December 2008):
 well stop drinking!
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A
female
reader, marieclaire  +, writes (31 December 2008):
 if this was the other way around we'd be telling you to leave your drunken violent boyfriend immediately. what you need to do is stop drinking. forever. seriously. if this seems like a problem then you need to get yo bum in an AA programme if you want to keep this guy
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers + ♥, writes (30 December 2008):
I know a guy who gets in fights when he's drunk so he doesn't drink.
It's just as easy to have fun while sober.
Give it a try not drinking. You'll be amazed how easy it is?
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, satindesire  +, writes (30 December 2008):
 You should probably give up alcohol, sweetie, before you hurt yourself or someone else.
Besides, alcohol is really bad for you, and can cause an awful lot of health problems in you future, and I know you don't want that.
Good luck honey, and remember, safe sex is the best sex, so use a condom EVERY TIME!!
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A
female
reader, katatonik +, writes (30 December 2008):
 If not drinking is what it takes for you not to be violent, you may have to continue to exercise moderation with regard to alcohol. You don't have to give it up cold turkey, but if you love this guy it would be in your best interests to stop a few beers or shots earlier so that you are buzzed rather than incoherently, out of your mid, don't-know-what-you are doing drunk. That isn't a particularly healthy habit anyway, even if you don't follow it up with violence.
Alternately, you can try speaking to a counselor and see if they have another solution for you.
Good luck =]
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