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What does it mean when women press their boobs into you?

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Question - (17 September 2010) 12 Answers - (Newest, 17 May 2012)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

What does it mean when girls push their breasts against you, or brush their breasts against you, when in conversation or whatever?

Over the years I have met many women who do this. It is not the majority, but certainly not a small minority either. For example, when joking around at a party or bar, they might grab your arm, and the result is basically pushing your arm/elbow into their breast. Or, they hug you from behind, like if you were sitting in a chair, and push their boob into your shoulder. Sometimes even just letting it rest there.

I guess I have always blown this off by saying, "she is just a touchy feely kind of girl.". But it always makes me wonder. If a girl is pressing against my "package" believe me, I am fully aware of it, and so would every other guy be. How can women really not notice. Is a boob just like an arm to them?

Or, is this a woman saying, in a subtle nonverbal way, maybe even subconsciously, "I am attracted to you, I am reacting to you in a sexual way - and I want you to react to me that way also."

The current woman I am thinking about does this to me all the time. She pushes her breasts all over my arms, shoulder, back - everywhere but the palms of my hands. She does this right in front of my wife. I asked my wife about it, and she just laughs - which made me wonder, is she one of the women who do this too?

What gives? Why do you women do this? What isn't supposed to mean?

View related questions: boobs, breasts

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A male reader, Obfuscator73814 Fiji +, writes (17 May 2012):

In case of women, emotion, feelings AND a lot of intangibles come into play…such women who don't mind bumping or pressing themselves against you have acquired some level of comfort in dealing with you, definitely more than casual friendship.

It's no secret that women's feelings blossom at quite odd occasions AND overtly so unless you want her to be the sure object of your affection either ignore or confront it ?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2010):

It is an opportunity. Express your happiness to her subtly and appreciate her softness in a gentle way. This will make her say one day that she would like you to explore her more and that's the way the play begins. Remember, you should be gentle and at the same time motivating her to express herself better

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2010):

A lot of these answers here are just misleading. Come on, a woman is very much aware were her breasts are. If they are touching your arm for a second then thats one thing......if they are actually pressed against a man's arm for a sustained amount of time then it is not an accident because if it was then they would move away.

If the woman is wearing a really tight bra then their is a possibility that she isn't aware. If she is not (i.e. if you can pretty much feel her breast itself rather than her cleavage) and it's for a while then its deliberate.

Anyone who tells you otherwise is being dishonest.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (18 September 2010):

birdynumnums agony auntHmmm....

I'm a DD cup, and mine have always seemed to mind their owner's wishes - and frankly, most people know when they have been bumped into. But resting them on someone's shoulder? Yeah, not accidental.

I'm just saying...

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A male reader, Odds United States +, writes (17 September 2010):

Odds agony auntWomen never do anything by accident. Sometimes there is an unintended consequence, but they know full well that they are putting their boobs on you. Some of the larger-breasted girls may be doing it incidentally, but when women are huggin you and grabbing your arm, they're flirting with a married man because it feels exciting and a little naughty.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (17 September 2010):

Honeypie agony auntI think either she is a tad rude ( invading someones space) or she is just one of those types who hug & touch people a lot.

I would not make more out of it then that.

IF a women does it in a sexual context, you will know right off the bat, there would be no doubt.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2010):

I have rather large breast and often times they will accidentally brush someone. In your analogy of a penis, you would have to be walking around with an erection all day, that would be more fitting because it would be sticking out away from the rest of your body and bound to accidentally touch someone. Now, I am sure, on the other hand that women do not brush their Va-jay-jays up against you...correct? THAT would have to be intentional. Of course it may have something to do with your proffession also....a women washing your hair at the salon cannot help it if her boobs are hanging in your face :)

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A male reader, Jmtmj Australia +, writes (17 September 2010):

Jmtmj agony auntUnless the palms come into play, I've never found it to mean anything really... generally just that she has a touchy feel-y personality.

The fact that she does it in front of your wife makes this lady sound completely oblivious to what her boobs may or may not be touching.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom + , writes (17 September 2010):

A woman used to do that to me a few years ago. I asked if it meant anything one day. Know what she said?

"I didn't even know I was doing it".

I had to laugh at this. Basically it meant nothing. I would imagine it's the same for most women. They probably don't even realize they're doing it.

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A female reader, LilPixie United Kingdom +, writes (17 September 2010):

LilPixie agony auntFor some women, yes it might be a way for them to flirt with people but I think for most women this won't mean anything. Most of them probably don't even notice it. I think it might also depend how big they are. Mine are quite big for instance and they do get in the way a lot. If I was to hug someone my boobs are bound to "push" or "brush" against the other person, there is just no way of avoiding it other than not to get too close.

Unless these people are showing other signs of being attracted to you or trying to flirt in any other way, I wouldn't read too much into it.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (17 September 2010):

birdynumnums agony auntWhen it's unintentional, it's at the dentist or the hair salon, due to proximity. At a party, in front of your wife - It's Intentional. It's actually insulting.

Here's the game... "Let's see how long I can hold court and hold your husband's attention; try to make him laugh; maybe dilate his pupils a bit; to show his wife that I can turn him on and insult her right in front of her face."

Yes, the woman is making a pass, and your wife doesn't wish to acknowledge the bitchy forward behavior to you as a pass because she doesn't want you dwelling or thinking on the other woman; giving the bitch more power than she deserves; because if your curiosity is aroused or your thoughts start drifting to the other woman; then the other woman will have won in your wife's eyes; that's why she laughed. It was sarcastic and she was laughing at the other woman's behavior.

She was happy that you were just confused and didn't play into the flirtation. BUT, she DOES expect you to step up to the plate and shut the other woman down. "Would you mind pointing those in another direction?" springs to mind.

And to answer your question; we do think of our breasts as a sexual part; we do protect them from bumping into other people; unless it's a brief, friendly upper body together/lower body apart hug (which we don't think of as sexual); and we do notice if someone has brushed up against them - we are always aware of them and trying to protect them. As a qualifier, I am a nice woman of fairly high morals and have never appeared in a Girls Gone Wild video - as far as their opinions and breasts go - well, I can't speak for them.

Wives are proud too, we have sexual egos too, and we don't appreciate it when our men go along with someone else hitting on them. Imagine if a guy started hitting on your wife and you wife flirted back right in front of you, Right?

Oh, and yes, there are a lot of women out there who think this is a fun game; trying to get attention from a friends husband. I call them ex-friends. I've known quite a few of these in my day (perhaps I should look at this as a compliment to my husband, who is rather dishy). There's a certain kind of woman who can only be happy if she has the attention of all the men in the room whether they are married or single. She usually isn't talking to any of the females; mainly because she has no female friends - they all know what she is up to.

This is the bitchy competitive side of women that most women refuse to either acknowledge or explain, but it does rear it's ugly head from time-to-time.

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (17 September 2010):

dirtball agony auntI don't think it means anything. Especially when it's incidental. I've been told that sometimes women will do this to flirt, but most of the time that isn't the case. When it's flirty, there will be plenty of other signs.

I've noticed this too. Getting a haircut, or going to the dentist, it's not uncommon for me to feel their breasts rub on my shoulder. I don't think of it sexually, more like their breasts are getting in their way. Still, I enjoy it even if I outwardly ignore it.

Maybe one of the girls here will prove me wrong though.

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