A
female
age
30-35,
*omBarbie
writes:Okay, my boyfriend is the sweetest guy ever. I so glad that I found him when I did.. Every girl in my town wants him, he makes music, art and he makes everyone around him feel amazing! He's leaving for University in three days and we are going to a friends birthday party tonight.. We are both virgins but I want to change that before he goes.. What can I do to publicly turn him on to the point where he just can't stand it anymore? Anything and everything will help! XOXO ZomBarbie
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both virgins, university Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, ZomBarbie +, writes (27 September 2013):
ZomBarbie is verified as being by the original poster of the question I realize now that the wording in this question is radiculous. Trust me, I'm not being selfish, I was stoned as balls. Anyways, the way this all started was because he TOLD ME that it is really attractive when a girl can make a guy hard without touching him.. He had been hinting at us having sex all week... I was totally not ready for that, especially since he is away from me more often then not. He lives in a different town and he is an exchange student, so he travels to see family a lot. Another thing is that the girl whom's party we were going to has a 'crush' on him and HE wanted to let her know that he was mine, and I was his. It was incredibly ignorant. II would also like to point out that its kind of hurtful what most o you have commented.. No, I am not an animal marking my territory. No, I don't think he will "stay with me longer if I sleep with him" I am not an idiot. And yes I do admit that I may lack sex appeal ( not because I'm un- attractive, but because I lack expirience) but that doesn't mean that I'm trying to "seduce or TORMENT" him.Thx babies.
A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (1 September 2013):
With respect, you’re being very selfish, or at least appear to be from the information provided, not to mention silly. “I want to change that”-o really? And does he want that too? Or have you not actually spoken to him about this. IF you’ve got 3 days together, why does it have to be on this public occasion tonight? It seems disrespectful to him, and to your friend if you’re going to spend the whole night trying to seduce him or torment him until he can stand it no more in front of everyone. It’s a good job you aren’t sexually active yet, I think you should remain this way for a little longer as you evidently lack the maturity required for a sexual relationship.
If you can’t appreciate that you need to talk this through together as a couple, privately, and you can’t understand that he needs to be ready as well, or you’re not even considering his emotional needs, then you’re simply not ready for sex. The fact you focus on other girls wanting him too makes me wonder if you’re not doing this to mask some insecurity...is that why it has to be now, and public?
You’ve got lots of growing up to do.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 September 2013):
 Yeah, I have a problem with the "publicly " too - poor kid, what do you want him to do, go around all night with a boner until you can drag him ...under a bush, or in the broom's closet ?:). Wouldn't that be embarassing for him ?
Plus, what's the rush, why has it got to be now or never ? because he's leaving ?.. Don't bet that if you sort of ambush him now, that ,per se, will make him stay with you, or be faithful to you . He'll stay if he likes you , and your relationship, enough , and he will be faithful if he is a loyal person who takes his relationship seriously. Only time will tell that, regardless whether you have sex in the next 3 days or not.
I'd suggest you to relax and let things happen naturally, at a pace that's comfortable for both. I get that you feel ready, but should he not be allowed to decide if he's ready too, without you tryng to force things ?
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (1 September 2013):
 Excuse me for saying so but you come across as very naive and immature.
We get that you think he's the bees knees but why do you have to turn him on publicly?...wouldn't that be a little embarrassing for the guy when he's still a virgin?...or do you just want to make a show for all your friends so you can stake your claim on him in public to ward off other girls?
If he has resisted sleeping with you up until now, he's probably not ready or just isnt as into you as you are into him!!
Having sex with him does not guarantee he will stay with you...you sound like an animal marking it's territory and I think you are a little afraid that he will meet someone else when he goes to University...that is a possibility and you should accept that. Rushing into sex and trying to get him aroused in public will make no difference at all.
Sorry to be down on you but you got to see how desperate your question appears.
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