A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupid,My ex boyfriend and I have been broken up for about one month. He basically dumped me because he said we were having problems. We were together for four years. Now I sometimes go on his myspace page ... I guess because I really miss him and its been really hard for me to let go . The last time I checked his page it said he was in a relationship. Him and I like I said were together for 4 Years and he never changed his status into a relationship when we were together because we always had issues with myspace. When I saw that he was in a relationship I almost threw up..... He changed hid status 3 weeks after we had broken up. I am really sad and it does get to me that he might be in a relationship because my ex is very spiteful and my other friends tell me that he did that to mess with me ..but i dont know what to think! or even how to act like it doesn't bother me...
View related questions:
broke up, my ex, myspace Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, lostone +, writes (10 September 2008):
I feel for you so much as I'm going through a similar thing as you, also about a 4 year relationship. I've been going through it about a month so far, a month of crying and feeling hurt and like I'm not good for anyone, made worse by the fact that I live with my ex and can't get away even when he's talking to the girl he cheated with.
You cannot begin to heal until you cut off all contact with him, including Myspace. Don't check it, do everything you can to try and stop yourself. If you have lots of friends, go out and have fun with them. They will be your best relief at this time. Don't bottle your feelings up either. You have to let it out and you have to talk to someone. It won't take it away, but it will help some.
My heart goes out to you and how terrible you're feeling. I wish I could tell you when it gets better but I don't know because I haven't hit that point yet. I hope you can take comfort in the fact though that you are not alone! Try to be strong during this tough time.
A
female
reader, sarcy24  +, writes (10 September 2008):
 Bubblygirl has given you excellent advice. The only thing to do is cut yourself off and put him way out of your mind. DO NOT contact him , text, email or look at myspace anymore. Whether he has done this to hurt you or not just don't participate. It is most definitely a rebound relationship and it won't last but don't dwell on this. It is all a matter of time. Fill your days up, work, study, garden or anything else that stops you thinking about him. 4 years is a long time and you need time to come to terms with the relationship being over. Truthfully obly time can do that but you can make it easier on yourself by not bothering with him mentally anymore. You will find that even after 10/12 days it gets a little better. I know the shock of reading that someone you love is with another is gut wrenching but you know now so put it out of your mind and do things for you that fill up time. All the very best, it will get better I promise you.
...............................
A
female
reader, bubblygirl  +, writes (10 September 2008):
Sounds like he's on a rebound relationship. You cant get into another relationship that fast after such a long commitment and be serious about it in my opinion.From my experience, I know it may be really hard, but cut yourself off from him completely. This is harder than it sounds, I know, but it does help to stay away and have breathing space, sort things out and move on. He obviously doesnt deserve you and Ive always gone by the quote, "if it didnt work out this time, theres always something better up ahead". Try to stay busy and positive and let feelings out. This is the best advice I can give you but it really takes time. Best of luck!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2008): I had the same problem with my last boyfriend we where together for two years n i still find myself looking on his myspace and even texting him sometimes when we where together he was always texting someone and with his new girlfriend he shuts his phone off...I still love him but the best thing to do is to try and get out as much as possible if your not near a computer then u cant check his myspace..And somewhere along the line you will think of him less and less it will still hurt to see him from time to time or to hear about them together but the best thing is to hold your head high and act like it doesnt bother you...Try to start dating again.Maybe you'll find someone outthere who will treat you better in many different ways. And will take his spot in your heart.....Well i hope i helped...I know it hurts and your not alone in the pain...~K~
...............................
A
female
reader, gr +, writes (10 September 2008):
Myspace can be merely a place good for panic attaks. many use it for evil. what were these "problems" he felt gavereason to break up with you? Please don't be sad about it.it's hard I know. but, to stay away from his myspace is best. My guess is he want's to hurt you again. he may be dating someone else but he will do the same thing to herafter her newness wears off. I'm so sorry, I had a boyfriend who was on myspace. it got real disgusting.and one of his special friends had a private account whichhe told me he never posted anything racey. demanding to see her page one night, I saw what I knew I would. lies and deceit. by the way are you saying on Myspace he has always left it as he was a single man? just looking fora good girl type thing? this is what the players do. my bf done same thing. an addicttion really, a constant quest of verification nobody is better than you..but your feelings are too important to let him figure out you were the best! best thing you could do..really--is enjoy yourself alone and with friends right now. be busy.and let him see your strength and what he has missed. you have no restrainst with other men now. go out, look around you. there are guys all around us...we don't see because we are too concerned about the "ex"
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2008): I also think he did that to piss you off...Ive thought of doing the same in the past but never did
...............................
|
