A
female
age
41-50,
*mitheroon
writes:A very close male friend of mine and I were FWB for about a year and a half. In the past month, we've suddenly gone from keeping it strictly physical to him asking me to spend whole days with him, me spending several hours with him at a time for 2-3 nights during the week, and having long, deep conversations. We've been FWB on my terms - as in, this was what I offered and it wasn't until I started giving him more time that he wants more of my time and has started wanting to spend hours snuggling me. In the past week I've been a little sensitive about things, probably just PMS, and twice I've asked him to clarify something and he responds with "you're ok." I'm NOT saying, "hey am I hot?" and he says "you're ok." It's been like me apologizing for being sensitive about weird things and that's his response. What does that even mean? Is that like saying "it's no big deal" ? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (4 March 2010):
I don't understand your question/issue? perhaps you were upset when you wrote this but I literally don't understand what you are asking us for advice about?
A
female
reader, smitheroon +, writes (4 March 2010):
smitheroon is verified as being by the original poster of the question I'm not necessarily asking him anything. I've been confused because as our relationship has changed from simply hooking up to all of this intimacy, I'm way more sensitive with him and things he does. Like for instance, one night he had said he was going to come over and then couldn't make it, which would have never been a big deal before, but then the next day he also sent me a text and when I responded he didn't respond again . . . and I start thinking . . . what if he doesn't really want to see me? So I tell him, you know if this isn't going where you wanted it then you can tell me and he was like, "You know me well enough to know I'll always be honest with you, right?" And I said, "I know, I've just been off lately, have to ask things straight these days, haha." Then he responds with, "you're ok :)"
I don't even get what that really means. That's my confusion. I also feel like my feelings are so strong, but I don't want to say anything or make it obvious because then what if I'm misreading everything and I lose someone who is fast becoming one of my closest friends?
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A
female
reader, Tine  +, writes (4 March 2010):
 well what is it that you are asking him?? how about trying to word it differently and asking him again?? It sounds as though you don't quite want much more than FWB and to be honest it sounds as though he is.
You both need to work out what you both want from this and decide how to act on it before someone gets hurt, or pi**ed off.
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