A
female
age
30-35,
*loveribbons
writes:(Mod note: please break up your massive wall of text next time with proper paragraph formatting. Many people fall away from such things.)My head is everywhere and I really need help and advice. I'm sorry that this is so long but I felt like all the details needed to be included. Ok, so I'm in my early twenties and I met the guy of my dreams back in January of this year. He's in his twenties too. We met on a night out in college, and what stuck out was the fact that we are both from the same small town and grew up five minutes from eachother and now live very closeby, yet we never knew eachother..it was very strange! Anyway we became very close very quickly and became almost inseperable. We were deleriously happy and many people would comment on how happy we were together and how 'made for eachother' we were. He introduced me to his family and his mum told me that she had never seen him so happy, and that I was the first girl he'd ever brought home, despite the fact that he has had several relatioships. His grandmother also told me one day that it was very clear to her how in love he was. My family also felt the same. So things were really really good. Of course we were not without our problems, and my boyfriend would sometimes get mad at me over my tendencies to throw strops and tantrums if I didn'y get my own way. He was right, I am not disputing that. But if I am honest I never really took on board what he was saying to me until he ended it very suddenly while I was in hospital having my appendix taken out. So that was two weeks ago. In the two weeks we have spoken every day, sometimes in a good way, sometimes in a bad way. For a time it felt like he was going to ask me to get back together because of the types of conversations we were having. Then he really hurt me one evening after about a week into the breakup by sending me a text that read 'there's no point in dragging this out..I've thought about it and it's better if we just leave things'. I was so upset, but instead of the usual pleading and begging I had been engaging in, I simple replied saying that I agreed with his decision and I hoped he'd be happy. I left it at that. Later on that night he began to text me telling me that he loved me and reminding me of certain funny memories we shared. I did not reply and the nest day he kept ringing me and he was asking me to meet up with him. I did not answer his calls even though I was desperate to, and we did not meet up. We were chatting a bit that night about nothing in particular and he suddenly became very distant with me. So I text him and told him that I was walking away because he was confusing me too much and it wasn't fair. I woke up the next morning to several missed calls form him and a message saying that he now understood what real lovw was. That night he was ringing me quite a bit telling me that he loved me and wanted to marry me. So the next night we met up and he told me that he'd really need me to change things like my strops and I agreed. That night we were on the phone until 4am and I know myself that I pushed him too far with questions like ''what do you want?'' ''where's this going?'' etc etc, and the next night he told me that he wanted it to be over for good. I was heartbroken. I felt so strung along. He was ringing me yet again that night though, despite the fact that I told him not to contact me again. I know I made him angry though because in the heat of the moment I told him I had a date with another guy, so he wasn't happy. Anyway, the next day he text me asking me if he could tell me something. I did not reply for a few hours, and when I did, I just said 'go ahead', to which he didn't reply. Anyway, that night (last Thursay the 2nd July), I went clubbing with my friends and he was in the same club. That really annoyed me because he knew I was going there that night, and after everything that happened I thought he'd leave me be. I kissed another guy twice in front of my ex, something I never thought I'd do. I think it was really immature and pathetic. I left the club soon after with my friends and saw my ex outside with his brother and his best friend crying a lot. I felt terrible. The next morning he text me a really angry message saying things like 'I actually still loved you up until I saw what you did last night..I can't believe I was actually regretting this breakup..you're a slut'' etc etc. I replied to him making the point that he had ended the relationship. He was just so angry though. That night we were on the phone and I can honestly say that I have never ever heard somebody cry so hard. It broke my heart and he repeatedly asked me why I had done it. Once again we met up and he was so upset it made me cry. We did an awful lot of talking though about what had gone wrong and stuff. The next day we saw eachother and he was sayin gthat he loved me and wanted to marry me etc, but that he was finding it really hard to get the image of me the other guy out of his head. I am really confused because I love this guy so much. I just can't explain it. The breakup in the first place came as such a shock, because literally the day before it happened he was telling me that he could never see himself with anyone else. Then the last two weks he has been back and forth so much. At the moment it's like one minute he's happy and fine, but then he thinks about me with the other gut and turns into a different person. I really need some advice on what to do or an opinion on what's happening, because I just don't know:(
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best friend, clubbing, get back together, grandmother, heartbroken, immature, my ex, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Iloveribbons +, writes (6 July 2009):
Iloveribbons is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut does it not mean that he doesn't love me anymore when he's beong so hot and cold?!:(
A
male
reader, citic101  +, writes (6 July 2009):
 Sounds like you love him and he loves you ! I would tell him to stop playing games and you stop playing games when he calls pick up the phone and just talk. Get back together you want to and he wants to , I cant understand all the fuss ? some couples love to fight because its more fun to make up
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