A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i was three months pregnant when i married in december. i can count on one hand the amount of times i have had sex in the last 10 months. i feel desperate to have sex but my husband is always too tired and would prefer to watch tv. i am back to my original weight and always keep myself nicely groomed and can still get mens attention but its my husband i want, to want me! he is on blood pressure tablets which may be the problem for his low desire but its really getting to me as the last thing i wanted was a sexless marriage. the cuddles and the love is there but we never have a passionate kiss which i also miss. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2009): i agree with duce00 and male anonymous, I think you need to talk to him. I would get him to go to the doctors and ask about changing the blood pressure tablets.
Good Luck
A
female
reader, sick and tired  +, writes (5 November 2009):
I completely understand. Women peak sexually in thier 40's while a mans desire goes down. He probably has low testosterone. There is a website lowt.com he can visit. This is very common at his age. I am sorry for you as it can make a women feel a man is not attracted to her and it is not you!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2009): Those blood pressure pills can have a real effect. You need to tell the doctor about this.
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A
male
reader, duce00 +, writes (4 November 2009):
 Sounds like you need an honest conversation with him. Look into erectile dysfunction and do some home work on male libido in addition to the responses you get here. Try approaching this logically rather than emotionally. My feeling is that it is not at all about you and your body image, look deeper.
I think there may also be a self esteem connection with this as well. If he is having trouble he may just want to avoid the embarrassment.
The most important thing is that you two have a heart to heart. I hope the other agony aunts and especially the agony uncles who have some experience with this join in.
Good luck!
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